


it's not living (if it's not with you)

by harrys1994



Category: MATCH: The Society (Web Series), The Society (TV 2019), The Society - Fandom
Genre: Angst, BAMF Grizz, Cuddling & Snuggling, Fluff, How Do I Tag, Leadership, M/M, Mutual Pining, Sleepy Cuddles, campbell is a dick, grizz is hurt, sam is hurt, there's barely any fic about them so here I am, they miss each other
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-22
Updated: 2019-10-01
Packaged: 2020-03-09 18:52:51
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 14
Words: 21,800
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18922996
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/harrys1994/pseuds/harrys1994
Summary: "Grizz?" A hopeful voice sounds behind him."You're back." Sam signs, the blue in his eyes brighter than he's seen them before, already wet with tears threatening to run over."I am." He says, body stiff and aching to touch Sam."You're safe." Sam reaches forward, his hands softly pushing back the strand of hair that fell from his bun.Grizz' jaw clenches at the touch, his eyes squeezed tightly as he takes a step back, out of Sam's reach."You're a father." He says, not bothering to sign it. Sam's face falls at the words, his eyes flicking between Grizz' lips and eyes multiple times in panic."And I have a town to fix."orin which grizz is a badass leader who wants to fight for what's right and (stupidly) believes he can't do that while being with sam(IT'S NOT THAT ANGSTY JUST IN THE BEGINNING BUT LOTS OF FLUFF LATER ON I PROMISE)(((I own none of these characters Netflix don't sue me pls this is just my interpretation of how things could go after season 1)))





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> helloooo fellow stans here's my attempt at quenching your grizz/sam thirst, please leave a comment or kudo!!!

"Grizz?" A hopeful voice sounds behind him.

A mumbled 'yeah' leaves his lips as he slowly turns around, knowing all too well it was Sam.

"You're back." He signs, the blue in his eyes brighter than he's seen them before, already wet with tears threatening to run over.

Grizz feels his body stiffening, unsure of what to do. He fights the urge to step forward and pull Sam into the embrace he's been missing ever since he left but doesn't give in to his feelings.

"I am." He ends up saying after having gone through a list of possible answers in his head.

"You're safe." Sam reaches forward, his hands softly pushing back the strand of hair that fell from his bun.

Grizz' jaw clenches at the touch, his eyes squeezed tightly as he takes a step back, out of Sam's reach.

"You're a father." He says, not bothering to sign it. Sam's face falls at the words, his eyes flicking between Grizz' lips and eyes multiple times in panic.

" _And I have a town to fix_." 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> oops

Grizz and the rest had come back to a very chaotic scene that had messed up Grizz' thoughts even more. The entire squad had been silent as the rest of the teenagers left the scene, mumbling opinions to each other.

"Okay," Bean spoke up, her face blank. "What the fuck happened while we were gone?" The five of them all exchanged looks, worry on every face.

"What do we do?" Mickey spoke.

Grizz' eyes were unfocused and staring at the ground, his mind going absolutely crazy as he tried to process what just happened. He'd only heard Mickey speak distantly, barely having heard it.

"Grizz?" He startled at the sound of his name and out of the trance he was in. When he looked up he saw that all 4 pairs of eyes were focused on him as if they were waiting for directions. "What do you suggest we do?" The question confused him, but by the look on their faces he could see that none of them were capable of taking the lead right now, and so he realized that they had unofficially already named him leader of the group.

"Well," He started, not exactly knowing where he was gonna go with it. "Let's see what houses are free. Apparently we missed out on quite a lot." The four of them nodded mindlessly and Grizz frowned.

"Okay, wait." His hand reached up to wipe at his face in a nervous attempt to get some of the dirt off, only making it worse.

"We don't know which side is right or wrong, but I have a feeling this whole Allie wanting to steal the election thing is bullshit. Campbell is untrustworthy as fuck," He struggled to put his thoughts into sentences. "Or at least.. That's what I'm feeling." Bean nodded along to his words.

"I don't know what the fuck you guys wanna do but I'm not buying this whole charade." A sigh left his lips, curses coming out as quiet mumbles.

_What the fuck am I supposed to do?_

"We're with you man." Mickey said, voice determined as the three others nodded along. 

_Oh boy._

_. . . . ._

After walking through most part of town and having found Allie's house empty and deciding it probably was a dumb move to stay there, they'd stumbled to Grizz' house. The four each found their own place in the house as Grizz went up to his room, jaw clenched at the memories that came flooding back of his day with Sam. He let himself fall onto the bed, a sigh leaving his lips. All Grizz wanted to do was sleep. Cuddled up in the sheets that probably still smelled like Sam and just sleep for a few days. He let his eyes fall shut, pushing his thoughts away and trying his best to stay calm.

It didn't last long. 

"Grizz?" Gwen's voice yelled from the hallway. He ignored it. "Grizz, Becca gave birth." Now those words made his eyes open widely, almost having forgotten she hadn't had the baby yet when he left. 

"Grizz?" Gwen called out again, a silent knock on his door. Tears were welling up in his eyes, focused on the white ceiling. 

"Okay." He said, just loud enough for Gwen to hear, as her footsteps were heard a minute later, leaving his door. The effort it took not to break down was something he hadn't experienced a lot in his life. It was as if all the air had left his lungs and someone has simultaneously ripped out a piece of his heart. 

"Fuck fuck fuck fuck," He muttered, hands reaching up to cover his face. 

_Stop it._

_One night_ , he thought. _You get one night to wallow. One night._  

And so he did. 

. . . . . 

Sounds of his stomach grumbling and doors being slammed in the house woke Grizz up. He hadn't left his room at all last night, skipping dinner just to let out the tears he had to get out of his system. Apparently his body hadn't quite agreed to that, his stomach making another disgruntled sound as he stood up to grab a shirt and pull on some sweats. 

The kitchen was occupied by three of the four people that were currently staying in his house. "Morning," Bean spoke, immediately sensing that Grizz wasn't feeling too well. The other two were pretty much clueless as they laughed at the state of Mickey, who'd also just woken up. 

"Morning," Grizz said, giving her a soft smile as she handed him some coffee. 

"So," Gwen started, "What's the plan today?" Looking at Grizz expectantly. 

_Plan. Right. What the fuck is the plan?_

"I suggest we go mingle today, find out what happened while we were gone." Four heads nodded. "Don't tell people we're staying here together, they'll get suspicious." He pondered, taking a sip of the coffee. 

"Split up. Bean, you go talk to Gordie and see what he knows. Gwen, maybe try to get Clark to say something." He gave her a look, hoping she'd catch on to what he was actually saying. Gwen was the one who had more power of Clark and she knew it. So did Grizz. "And you two go talk to the people, see what they're thinking. Be subtle." 

"What are you gonna do?" Mickey asked. 

 _Look for Sam._  

"See what the fuck happened to The Guard," He mumbled, still in disbelief of how they'd actually done what they had been talking about before Grizz left. 

The kitchen got silent as they all looked at him, not sure if he was done or not. A chill ran over Grizz' neck as he said, "That's all." It felt dismissive, as if he was some dictator. But it seemed to be what they had been waiting for, all going on with their morning after that. 

"Holy fuck," He whispered to himself, unsure of how he felt because of all of this. 

 

. . . . .

It had taken him three minutes of being outside before he saw Sam in the distance, a rush of warmth running through his body at the sight as he stilled. It was a weird combination of stress, relief, pain and hope. Honestly, who even knew what the fuck was happening to Grizz. 

So there he was, standing still in the middle of the road, his entire body frozen, unable to move as he stared at the redheaded boy. Their eyes met and with that, Grizz' body moved. A step forward, a hesitant step back and then he quickly turned around. 

 _What the fuck was that?_ He thought to himself.

"Grizz!" He heard Sam's voice straining as he tried to yell his name. 

"Grizz?" A hopeful voice sounded behind him. A mumbled 'yeah' leaves Grizz' lips as he slowly turns around, knowing all too well it was Sam.

"You're back." He signs, the blue in his eyes brighter than he's seen them before, already wet with tears threatening to run over. Grizz feels his body stiffening, unsure of what to do. He fights the urge to step forward and pull Sam into the embrace he's been wanting ever since he left but doesn't give in to his feelings.

"I am." He ends up saying after having gone through a list of possible answers in his head.

"You're safe." Sam reaches forward, his hands softly pushing back the strand of hair that fell from his bun. Grizz' jaw clenches at the touch, his eyes squeezed tightly as he takes a step back, out of Sam's reach.

"You're a father." He says, not bothering to sign it. Sam's face falls at the words, his eyes flicking between Grizz' lips and eyes multiple times in panic.

**"And I have a town to fix."**


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello hi yes here I am already w an update! lol  
> no grizzam but yanno the story needs some context I can't just go whoop new ham is ok dw!  
> please leave a comment or a kudo I love comments hihi :)

Running into Sam was the absolute worst thing that could've happened to Grizz at that moment. He thought he was gonna be able to mask away his feelings and that he got most of it out from the night before, but having Sam stand in front of him, touching him, looking at him with bloodshot eyes was just a slap in the face. 

Grizz was never a rude person, he knew that, the whole town knows it. If you were to ask New Ham what Grizz was like, even before their lives got fucked over, everyone would say the same. Kind, caring, poetic, always trying to help everyone. That's why it was so hard for him to act so cold towards Sam. He hadn't planned on it. They left each other on good terms, or at least what you could call good terms in these circumstances.

"I'll see you soon," He had said, unsure of what the future held, and if he would even make it back home. He had given Sam hope and had taken it away again. He had hurt him. He was disgusted by himself, but it felt like something he had to do. To let Sam have his family. With Becca. Not Grizz. 

In an attempt to calm himself down, Grizz had taken out his hair-tie and let his hair fall in front of his eyes, knowing and feeling that they once again looked bloodshot from holding back his tears. A mumble of curses slipped from his lips for what seemed like the millionth time the last twenty four hours. 

_Jesus fucking Christ. Pull yourself together, man._

And so he continued making his way to Harry's house, guessing that Campbell and the rest of The Guard were probably also there. 

Knocking on the door wasn't necessary, as Jason was sat on the front porch, a baseball bat next to him. 

"Hey man," He started, Jason looking at him suspiciously.

"Grizz is here!" He shouted, eyes not leaving him for a second. A frown appeared on Grizz' face, not having expected Jason to switch sides  _this_ quickly. He seemed more like a pet than he ever had before, obviously very keen on doing his job right. 

"Are you ok.." Grizz didn't get to finish his sentence, as Campbell opened the door with a smile on his face that screamed psychopath. 

 _They should have listened to Sam. Should've fucking listened to Sam._  

"Look who it is!" Campbell said, stepping aside to hold open the door. "We've been expecting you." Grizz stepped inside, giving Jason one last look but he avoided Grizz' eyes like the plague. The house was quiet, now that apparently everyone had gone back to their own homes. Grizz eyed the stairs curiously, feeling Campbell's eyes burning into him. The creepy smile was still playing on his lips when he looked up at the other Eliot brother. 

 _How the fuck did Sam live like this for 18 years._  

"So, I'm guessing you want to see everyone?" Campbell said, not expecting an answer as he started walking to the office. Harry was sat at the desk, looking like absolute shit. "Hey!" Campbell snapped, making Harry sit up straight and faking a tiny smile as he saw Grizz. 

_So that's how it is._

"Grizz, meet you new mayor. Or, at least one of them." Campbell took a seat in one of the couches, gesturing for Grizz to do the same. 

"What can I do for you?" Harry said, eyes blinking unnaturally, hands shaking and sniffing as if he had allergies. Grizz had to repress an eyeroll as he realized what was happening. It was so fucking clear, and he almost felt pity for how bad their little game was hidden. 

He hesitated when speaking up, knowing well enough that his words had to be chosen carefully, if he didn't wanna make himself seem more suspicious. 

"Well, the search party got back yesterday. I just assumed a report is wanted about it?" Both of them had seemed to have forgotten all about that, realization hitting them.

"Yes! What did you find? Land?" Harry said, clenching and unclenching his fists. 

"We did. Since you're apparently the mayor now," It almost hurt his head just saying that, but he had to stay in their good graces now. "I wanted to ask if there could be a road built in-between the town and the field, so we can drive a car instead of having to walk for hours." Harry's eyes wandered to Campbell, who gave him a curt nod. 

"We'll put it in the work schedule." Harry said. "Anything else?" 

Grizz asked about his place in tThe Guard and tried to play his role as good as possible, knowing how suspicious Campbell was of him. Campbell knew Grizz was one of the smart guys. Clark and Jason were followers, they were easy to get on board. Luke had taken some _convincing,_ but that's something Grizz didn't need to know. Campbell couldn't help but smirk. 

 Grizz could feel the eyes burning into his skull but tried to ignore it as best as he could as he talked to Harry, who hadn't stopped sniffing and twitching the whole time they'd been talking.

"I'm gonna go take a shit, if that's alright," He started, feeling uneasy of how he talked, but that was how the other two did so he had to go along with it. "The woods aren't exactly comfortable, if you get what I mean." Campbell nodded at that as he grimaced at the thought. Harry just nodded eagerly and immediately looked at Campbell. 

_Oh god._

Grizz stood up and walked through the house, opening some door quietly and making sure no one was around. The bathroom was around the corner and he actually did have to pee so that's what he did, quickly, so he could look around for another minute. 

Whispers were heard down the hall, and Grizz smoothly but silently walked over to it, immediately recognizing Allie and Will's voices. 

"Allie," He whispered, hoping it was just loud enough for her to heart. It was quiet immediately behind the door. 

"Grizz?" He heard, quietly. 

"Grizz," He looked around him one more time, just to make sure he was safe as Allie started talking softly. "They're lying." 

"I know," He whispered. "I know," 

"You have to help. Fix it." Allie said quickly, and footsteps made Grizz walk back to the door of the bathroom, just as Luke rounded the corner.

Grizz pretended to shut the door behing him again and tried to look surprised to see him. 

"Hey," He spoke softly. Luke gave him a curt nod and gave himself away by looking at the door Allie and Will were behind. 

"You okay?" Grizz looked at the door just like Luke, but with an amused look on his face, as if he didn't know what was happening. 

"Yeah, just heard your voice earlier and you weren't in the office when I got there, so.." Grizz had known Luke for years, and was surprised Luke didn't how bad of a liar he was when it came to Grizz. He might've not planned on seeing him much once he left for college, but Luke would always have a special place in his heart. Sometimes he felt like he knew Luke better than he knew himself. 

From just the look Luke was giving him, and the way he was eyeing the door, Grizz knew Luke's heart wasn't in this. He couldn't help but think about the evening when Jason and Clark had said those things about Allie, and how she needed to be 'stopped'. He pushed the thoughts to the back of his head and walked towards his friend. 

"I just came to tell them about the search party. Ask how things are with The Guard." Luke looked at him as if he actually _wanted_ Grizz to ask him what the fuck was going on. So he did. 

"Allie?" Grizz asked, carefully. 

Luke's eyes drifted towards the door again and he quickly regained himself all in a second. "Don't worry about it." He said. 

Frustration ran through his body at the non-answers he was getting and at how he felt that Luke wanted to tell him, but he couldn't. His fists clenched by his sides before he padded Luke on the shoulder and walked back to the office.

He had to hold back his snort as Harry looked at him way more alert than minutes before, obviously having received his fix from Campbell as a tiny bit of white powder was still seen on the desk. 

"I'm going," Grizz spoke, "Gonna see how everyone in the town is doing." Campbell nodded at that, his head obviously somewhere else than before as his eyes were just staring at the bookcase in front of him. 

"Bye," A soft voice spoke from the corner. It almost startled him to see Elle sitting in the couch. Eyes a mix of a hundred emotions. 

"Bye," He mumbled, and he had to refrain himself from running out of the house. 

_Fucking hell. Fuck. What the actual fuck?_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> if you have nay suggestions for the next grizzam scene hmu im not sure what I'm gonna do with it yet so leave a comment!  
> aLSO! I have a final tomorrow so updates might be a lil slow byeee


	4. Chapter 4

The cafeteria was quite crowded when Grizz walked in, people still murmuring about yesterday's events. Out of the corner of his eye, Grizz spot Bean talking to Gordie. Hopefully she'd come home with some information that night. Something that could enlighten him n the mess he'd discovered at Harry's house. Everything was so fucking fucked up. A headache had been forming ever since he left that house and the murmuring in the cafeteria was not helping him. At all. 

He couldn't help but look around for any sign of Sam. He wasn't even sure whether he wanted him to be there or not. Not seeing him was probably for the best, as he would most likely be with Becca and his... baby. But seeing him would have maybe calmed him down a bit. Just the presence of the redheaded boy had soothed him often in the past few months. He'd been looking out for him a lot. Whenever he had to say something in a big group, he'd somehow let his eyes wander to Sam, as he addressed the rest. Or when they were just talking in a small group, at Allie's house, he often focused his attention on Sam. 

It wasn't an obvious thing to do, since Sam had to read lips to be able to follow the conversation. It also didn't make Sam himself feel uncomfortable, as his eyes were focused on Grizz' lips, while Grizz was actually just staring at Sams eyes. It was one of the few chances he got to really look at him, so he took advantage of it. 

So when he didn't spot Sam anywhere, a small wave of disappointment hit him as he went to get some food. Guess he wasn't even in a place to feel disappointed, as he'd been so mean to him that morning. 

 

. . . . . 

 

"Did you get it?" Becca signed, eyes lingering on Eden's crib before looking up at Sam. He avoided her eyes, looking down at the floor as he put the clothes she asked for on the hospital bed.

The hospital was quiet for the first time in a few weeks. After the Thanksgiving fiasco and up to Becca giving birth, the hospital had been quite occupied. The only sounds Becca had heard the last twenty-four hours were Eden's crying and her own voice. Sam had been quiet lately. Ever since Thanksgiving. And Becca had been too caught up in her pregnancy to notice it or pay more attention to it. So now, non-pregnant and bored, Becca noticed Sam's odd behavior the second she laid eyes on him. 

He sat down on the chair next to the hospital bed and seemed to be staring into nothingness as Becca tried to get his attention. After trying for a good thirty seconds, Becca decided to go for the rough wat and threw the half-full bottle of water at his head. 

"Ow!" He startled out of his gaze and looked up at Becca, offended and confused. "What was that for?" He signed, obviously pissed. Becca couldn't help but smile at his reaction. 

"What's been going on with you?" Sam stared at her, unsure of how to react. "You've been acting very odd lately. You've been crying. I can tell." Sam shrugged. 

"Ofcourse I've been crying," He signed, motioning to Eden. Becca shook her head. 

"Sam," His eyes left hers again for a second, scratching his head as he was lost in thought. Unsure of what to say. "There's something that's making you sad, and you're not telling me." 

He shrugged again. 

"This is a little presumptuous to say, but I know it's not Eden. I can see it." He quickly shook his head. "Ofcourse it's not Eden." He signed, a small smile on his face as he looked at her crib. 

"You know you can tell me anything, right? Did Campbell do something?" Becca signed, her blood boiling at the thought. 

"No!" Sam spoke, face in panic. A sigh left his lips as he ran a hand over his face. Becca looked at him in silence, she could almost see his head working, preparing his hands for what he wanted to say. 

"Thanksgiving," He starts. "I wasn't just sleeping." Becca frowns. "I was with Grizz." Grizz is the only word he says out loud, his voice breaking. 

Realization hits Becca as soon as Grizz' name drops. All the pieces suddenly fall together, and she's unsure to react happy or sad, given the state Sam is in. A tear falls from Sam's face and she just wants to pull him into a hug.

"That's why he was almost crying when he found out I was pregnant." She signs, Sam nodding. 

The next five minutes, Sam gives Becca a very shivery short version of what happened between them. She doesn't need to know everything, but she deserves to know some things. 

"You little shit," Becca says when Sam is finished. He'd been softly crying throughout his story, not bothering to talk as his brain was already too tired by signing and crying. Becca reached up to his face and gently wiped away his tears with the sleeves of her sweater. 

"If you would've just told me when it happened, this all wouldn't be a problem." Sams looks at her in confusion. 

"What do you mean?" 

"Grizz is one of the most trustworthy guys in this entire town. If there's someone to pick out of all of the boys here, it's him." Sam was still looking at her as if she'd grown two heads. Becca sighed. 

"Go tell him, idiot. Just tell him to keep it to himself. He'll do it. I trust him." Sam started shaking his head, but Becca took ahold of his hands before he could start. She knew it was a dick move but it seemed necessary. A small kiss was pressed on top of Sam's knuckles as he looked up at her. 

"I'm not letting you throw this amazing thing away. You both deserve this. Tell him." Becca's determined eyes were what convinced Sam. He nodded, standing up to press a kiss into Becca's hair and sat back down. 

"What are you doing? Go get your Grizz!" She signed, a laugh escaping her lips. 

He made sure Kelly was around before indeed leaving to go get _his Grizz._


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i wrote this while sleep deprived in-between study breaks as an attempt to distract myself. please don't hate it. 
> 
> anygays, fluffy grizzam? do we stan?

Grizz' day had been eventful, to say the least. It had been a long time since he'd been as happy as he was now to see the couch in his living room.

A groan of contentment was made as he flopped down, neck falling back against a pillow as his long legs draped over the side table. The small amount of time he spent in Harry's house fucked up his brain more than he'd expected it to when he walked in that morning. Things had obviously gone to shit when he was gone, and it didn't even surprise him all that much. Jason and Clark were his friends but they'd never been good at thinking for themselves, that's why Grizz was quite relieved when they'd came into their position's with The Guard. 

The sound of the front door shutting snapped him out of his thoughts and he looked up, expecting to see one of the other search party members. Instead, he eyes met with Sam.

A soft gasp involuntary left his lips and he immediately felt the warm rush he felt this morning going over his body, once again. This time it was less stress, and more regret. "Sam," He said, voice barely a whisper. 

The boy stood in the doorway, unsure of what to do, how to stand, where to look. Silence filled the room as their eyes met, both frozen in place. 

"W-What are you doing here?" Grizz finally managed to get out, hands attempting to sign it but the combination of his lack of knowledge and nerves probably made it make even less sense for Sam. 

Sam carefully took a step forward, into the living room. Grizz was still frozen on the couch, having to look up at Sam for the first time, instead of looking down. He'd remembered how Sam had been on his tiptoes when he kissed him goodbye last time. He had refrained himself for picking Sam up off the ground in the embrace. 

_Grizz. Focus._  

"I want to talk to you," Sam spoke. The stress that hadn't been there earlier was now fully back, Grizz' fingers pushing back the hair that was falling onto his face. Sam's heart jumped at the movement, not being able to hold back the soft smile that graced his lips. 

Grizz eventually nodded, standing up from the couch and once again towering over Sam, who looked up at him innocently. 

"Oh, damn you," Grizz spoke, a frown on his face as he finally pulled Sam into the embrace he'd been craving for days. The two boys relaxed into each other, as if they'd never even left sides. Grizz nuzzled his face into Sam's neck, the overwhelming feeling of both happiness and pain getting the best of him as a tear slipped from his eye. He felt like his body was melting into Sam's arms, having to do his best not to fall over.

Every emotion he'd been feeling the last few months poured out of him. The constant living in fear, unsure of what the future would hold, if there even was a future to begin with.

The painful pining he'd been doing over Sam.

Getting Sam.

Losing Sam.

It all became too much. 

Sam pulled back to look at Grizz' face, a knowing frown appearing on his as he saw the look in his eyes and the tears streaming down his cheeks, eyes already bloodshot.

Softly pulling him along, Sam sat down on the couch. Grizz was tall as fuck, which didn't seem to be an issue for the two as Grizz was nearly sat on Sam's lap as if he were cradling a baby. With his legs draped over Sam's lap, and face still nuzzled in Sam's neck, Grizz let out a shaky breath. 

They didn't need to talk for now. Grizz needed comfort, they both did.

Grizz' breathing hit his neck irregularly, wetness continuing to fall onto the hood of his hoodie as Sam attempted to soothe the boy by gently playing with the hair at the nape of Grizz' neck. Sam felt his heart break at the situation. Grizz hadn't said a word about what or how he was feeling, but it was as if it he didn't even have to explain. Sam just _knew_.

As Grizz' breathing slowed down, and Sam felt that the boy's heart rate was finally normal again, he decided it was best for Grizz to make take a nap. So that's how a much smaller Small ended up with Grizz' entire body sprawled over his, head on his chest as Sam's steady heartbeat lulled Grizz into some much needed rest. 

And that's how Bean found the two boys an hour later. Sam half awake as he was almost afraid to fall asleep, scared that Grizz would leave, or that something was gonna happen to him. One hand was still on Grizz' back as the other one was still soothingly running through Grizz' hair. Bean decided that it was best not to startle Sam by making her presence known, and just walked through to the kitchen. 

She'd seen it in his eyes that morning. The remains of dried tears. If she hadn't known better, she'd have thought Grizz was just high as fuck. Seeing him with Sam clarified a lot for her, the pieces immediately falling into place. Becca. The baby. No wonder he looked as if a truck had hit him. 

Bean messaged the other three current residents of the house, to check what time they were planning on heading back. A satisfied smile reached her lips as neither of them were planning on getting there for at least three more hours. _Good_ , she thought. _Grizz needs it._  

 

. . . . . 

 

Grizz woke up feeling lighter than he had in a long time. With his eyes still closed, he remembered where he was, as his sleeping places had been changing a lot the past few months. The steady beat he felt underneath him made all his memories flow back and he couldn't help but smile as he wrapped his arm around whatever it was that he got ahold of tugging Sam closer to him, as if that was even possible. 

Sam had to stop himself from fonding too hard as he saw the small smile on Grizz' face, knowing he was awake. He softly tapped Grizz' cheek a few times in an attempt to make him look at him. 

Grizz tiredly looked up at Sam, a smile playing on his lips. 

"How do you feel?" Sam struggled to speak, not being able to sign as he didn't wanna let go of Grizz. "Better." He answered. Sam pushed back the hair that fell onto Grizz' face with a frustrated groan. 

"What?" Grizz asked, confused by the frown on Sam's face. "What is it?" He asked again, when Sam was actually looking at his lips. 

"Your hair," His voice came out raspier than normal, "It's crazy." Grizz held back a laugh. He hadn't seen Sam frustrated a lot, so having him look at his hair as if it offends him was a strange concept. 

"Grizz," A female voice snapped him out of his bubble and he looked up to see Bean standing in the doorway, his cheeks immediately heated up in embarrassment. Not because she wasn't allowed to know about him being gay, nor his feelings towards Sam. He just knew how vulnerable he looked, and he didn't like it when people saw him like that. 

"I just wanted to tell you that the rest will be here in about fifteen minutes. Didn't wanna wake you but I assumed you'd like your privacy." Grizz just nodded at her, a small, approving smile on her lips. 

"Shut up," He mumbled at her, knowing she'd get that he was joking. The look she gave him said enough before she walked back to the kitchen with a grin on her face.

He attempted to sit up, looking at Sam whose cheeks were even brighter than his.  A laugh escaped his lips at the sight, his head thrown back as he laughed heartedly, for male the first time in weeks. 

"Calm down," He said, ruffling his hands through Sam's hair. "You're almost as red as your hair." He spoke, knowing Sam would get what he was saying. An offended gasp left Sam's lift as he sat up, playfully trying to push Grizz away from him. Grizz took ahold of both of his wrists in his one hand before Sam's hands even touched his chest. Sam stilled, curious eyes looking up at Grizz, both of them breaking out in grins at the eye contact. 

Grizz didn't bother trying to stop himself as he kissed the corner of Sam's mouth, letting go of one wrist and slipping his fingers into the other hand. Sam was blushing again, obviously not used to the attention nor the affection. 

_How the fuck did I get in so deep, so quickly,_ Grizz wondered

"Talk?" He then asked, free hand signing and then pointing to the ceiling. Sam nodded, squeezing his hand. 

_Talk_. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> o o f


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> short lil piece cus i wanted to give u guys something, longer chapters will be coming soon i'm just very busy with school currently!

Neither of them were looking forward to the conversation, that was probably why they sat on Grizz' bed in silence for about five minutes. Their shoulders were nearly touching, backs to the headboard of Grizz bed. Both boys were looking everywhere but at each other, the closeness and cuddliness from earlier completely gone now. Grizz almost felt uncomfortable being this close to Sam but not actually touching, so he fixed that as he draped Sam's legs over his. Sam almost started from the movement but then smiled, the touch calming both of them down. 

Grizz didn't know if he should start by asking questions or if Sam was just waiting to find the right words, but the silence was getting annoying, and he just wanted to get this over with. Never in his life had he wanted to avoid a topic or a conversation more than this one. Finding out that the guy you slept with and might be falling in love with just had a baby with his best friend wasn't really the scenario he'd expected to become his life once they got stuck in this fucked up alternate universe thingie.

 _It is what it is._  

"Okay," He sighed, patting Sam's leg so he would look up. "Let's just get this over with?" He said, doing his best to sign along, but he still had a long way to go. 

Sam nodded, hands shaky as he attempted to make sweater paws. Grizz frowned at that. Sam's hands were one of the most expressive things about him, beside's his face. Grizz knew how hard it is to just _talk_. The day they spent in the garden, Sam had told Grizz he could ask away when it came to him being deaf. It's normal for people to have a lot of questions about it, he just wasn't willing to answer every person. But Grizz was different. He could ask him anything in the world and Sam would still try to answer him as well as possible. 

So, Grizz asked away as Sam answered. He learned about how difficult it was to both sign and talk at the same time. How just talking was even harder. How trapped he sometimes felt by his own mind, cause he _wanted_ to say something. He wanted people to _understand_.

Sam's voice broke frizz out of his thoughts, hands still trapped by the sleeves, unmoving. 

"Remember at prom, I was sitting by myself at a table when you came and sat with me?" Sam spoke, voice shaky but determined, not bothering to look at Frizz before continuing. "I'd had a fight with Becca before that. She told me she was pregnant. I didn't see it as a problem." 

One of his hands slipped out of the sleeve and grabbed at his throat, insecurity in his eyes. Grizz took ahold of the hand that was still in Sam's lap in an attempt to encourage him. 

"You can sign it, you know. I can understand most of it when you mouth along." He said when he knew Sam was looking. 

"No." Sam spoke. "I want you to hear me say this." With his legs thrown over Grizz', Sam turned his torso more to Grizz, looking at his face as Frizz looked down at their hands. 

"She got mad because I asked her who the father was." Grizz' eyes shot up at that, confusion clouding his head. 

"What do you mean? Did she have sex with someone else around the time you did?" Sam shook his head. 

"We never slept together. The first time I ever kissed someone is when I kissed you." Grizz' frown only got worse as he was trying to process Sam's words. 

"So, you're not the father?" 

"Eden is my baby, I am her father, but not the biological one. Becca doesn't want to tell me who is, and she was scared people were gonna say she's a slut. We made a deal." Grizz' mind could explode about now. 

"Fuck," Was all he said as he stared in front of him, attempting to absorb what was just thrown at him. 

"So," He started after a minute or so. "You're not together?" Sam winced at that, shaking his head. 

"Love her, but yuck." Grizz laughed at that. 

"So you're not together, you never slept together. You are the father though and you're gonna raise the baby together." Sam nodded along to his words, reading Grizz' lips intensely. "And you're telling everyone it was a one time thing." Sam nodded again, shrugging. 

"Wow," Grizz muttered, that did explain a lot. His hands finally let go of Sam's. 

"Does she know? About us?" He signed, and it almost hurt him as he remembered the last time he asked Sam that question. The boy chuckled at that, getting his hands out of the sweater paws. 

"She got it out of me earlier." Grizz frowned, but couldn't help but smile as he saw Sam's face. 

"Does that mean she's okay with all of this?" Grizz gestured at the both of them, hope spreading through his body. 

Sam nodded. _Fuck yes._

"You can't tell anyone about Eden though." Sam said, eyes serious as he signed. Grizz nodded frantically at that. If keeping that secret was all he had to do for being with Sam, he'd keep the fuck out of it. 

Not being able to contain himself, Grizz cupped Sam's face with his hands and kissed him, catching the redheaded boy by surprise. He softly eased in to the kiss and slipped one hand up to Grizz' hair to push back a strand, _once again_. Grizz started laughing at that and pulled back. 

"Crazy hair!" Sam said, and cuddled into Grizz' side, who put his arm around Sam and sighed in contentment as they shared a look. 

"Are we like, dating? Or what? 'Cause everybody in this town seems to be hooking up with everybody and I'm really not up for that." His eyes widened as he thought of all the different relationships. 

"They are, aren't they." Sam said, almost looking offended at the thought. "Oh!" He exclaimed, almost having forgotten the other part of Grizz' sentence. "I would like us to be together, if that's what you want of course." Sam signed, having used his voice enough for the past few minutes. 

"That's what I want." Grizz said, cheeks getting red. 

"Boyfriend." Sam signed, knowing Grizz wouldn't know what it meant, so he did it again as he said the word. Grizz' face went from confusion to realization and he soon signed the word as well. 

"Sam is my boyfriend." He signed, looking way too fucking smug about it.

The pair started chuckling and in that moment, neither of them thought about everything else going on outside of the room. It was just them, together. 

Grizz pressed a kiss against Sam's forehead and sighed in happiness. 

 _Boyfriends huh_.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thank you so much for all the kudos and comments the past few days u guys are amazing and i love you <3


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> more fluff & angst oops

"Grizz!" Gwen's voice was heard in the hallway, and Grizz had to stop himself from rolling his eyes in annoyance. Sam frowned, "What is it?" He asked. 

"Gwen's calling my name, I'm guessing everyone's home." That didn't make Sam's frown disappear, he didn't really know anything about the town at the moment, having been with Becca and Eden the past few days. 

"Oh, yeah," Grizz started as he realized the boy knew nothing about Campbell having taken over. "You and Becca need an update on the town as soon as possible. The rest of the search party are now staying here. Nearly everyone's gone back to their own homes." 

"Campbell?" Sam signed, disappointment and fear taking over his expression. Grizz didn't know how to react apart from nodding as he reached out a hand to Sam, pulling him up from the bed. 

"Should I call Becca?" Sam asked, already grabbing for his phone.

"Yes, but tell her to be subtle, we don't want people to get suspicious about anything. If anyone asks, she's just showing me the baby, okay?" Sam tapped away as the pair walked downstairs. Grizz walked in to the living room to see the other four teens impatiently waiting for him to join them.

Gwen's expression was almost disappointment as she noticed how Sam's free hand was intertwined with Grizz', confirming what Grizz had told her when he turned her down earlier that week. Apart from Bean, the other two were too nervous to notice the touch or even think something behind the fact that Sam was there. 

"She's coming." Sam signed to Grizz and sat down next to him, saying hi to everyone before going back to his phone. Four pairs of eyes were suddenly focused on them, Mickey's head tilted as he looked at the pair and their proximity. 

"Are you two..." He started, finger pointing between the two of them. "Yup." Grizz butted in before he could finish his question. Sam was tapping away on his phone, clueless to the conversation. 

"So that means you're..." Mickey didn't finish the question, letting it linger for Grizz to fill in. 

"Uh huh," Grizz nodded, shrugging. Mickey's eyes widened. 

"Wow." Bean slapped his arm, scowling at him and he quickly started stuttering apologies. 

"It's not a bad wow! It's a wow I didn't see that coming but totally support you and this whole thing and I guess it's good for me because that means all the girls that want you will have to look for a replacement." He rambled, making everyone chuckle as his cheeks reddened. "It seriously isn't a bad wow, Grizz. I'm sorry." Mickey ensured him, nodding at him with a confirming smile.

"Don't worry about it," Grizz finally said, Mickey deflating at the words. 

Sam finally looked up from his phone and narrowed his eyes when he saw four people look at him and Grizz in almost adoration. He then looked at Grizz, who just seemed smug about the situation and sighed, shaking his head. 

They waited another few minutes, waiting for Becca to show up before they could start. Grizz stood up once he heard the doorbell ring and walked to the door, wanting to talk to Becca before they got into anything else. 

He opened the door to reveal a tired but happy looking Becca, with a little baby girl in her arms. Grizz swallowed, emotions bubbling up at the sight of such a tiny little thing. 

"Hi," He croaked, feeling a soothing hand on his back, knowing it was Sam as he stepped aside so Becca could come in. She immediately smiled at the touch and handed the baby over to Sam, who looked more than happy to take over. 

"You okay?" Becca asked Grizz, taking ahold of his forearms. "Did Sam explain?" He nodded, eyes watery. 

"Are you sure you don't mind, Becca?" Grizz asked, insecurity evident on his face. Becca pulled him into a hug, her arms around his waist as she whispered. "As long as you're okay with this, so am I. Don't blame Sam for anything. He just wanted to help." Grizz hesitantly hugged her back, one hand reaching up to wipe away a tear that had escaped his eye. 

"I'm okay with it." They pulled back from the hug to see Sam looking at them nervously, rocking the baby. Becca signed him something that went too quick for Grizz to follow, but the smile on Sam's face told him enough. 

"C'mon," Grizz said, motioning his head to the door as he wiped at his eyes. 

 A shaky breath left his mouth, feeling lighter knowing that Becca was good with everything. 

That's _something_ positive about the day. 

 

 

. . . . .

 

 

"So," The two boys finished, telling everyone about how most people in the town were reacting to the news of Allie and Will. There were a lot of mixed feelings, some just wanting their houses back, not wanting to work. Others didn't believe a thing about Allie trying to steal the election. She came up with it, why would she want to steal it then? Some people trusted Campbell, some didn't.

Only a few actually knew he was a psychopath, Grizz, Becca, Will and Allie being some of them. Sam's eyes were stone cold as Becca finished signing for him. His jaw was set tight, feeling the anger rising within him at the thought of his brother taking over. 

"Can you," He started, motioning for Grizz to take the baby. Grizz' eyes widened. 

"Grizz, it's fine. Eden's very calm, don't worry about it." Becca said, assuring him.

_Eden_. 

Sam handed over Eden and Grizz' body went numb as he looked down at the little baby. A wave of emotions ran over him as he stared at the tiny creature. 

"It's so small." He whispered, eyes wet once again.

_What the fuck is up with me today, all these fucking emotions._

He could hear soft chuckles around him, Bean and Gwen both also tearing up at the sight of the tall boy melting at the sight of a baby. 

"You okay?" Sam asked him, the anger in his eyes now slightly softened, hand pushing back the hair that fell into Grizz' eyes. A laugh mixed with a sob escaped Grizz' lips as he looked up at Sam.

"It's so fuckin' tiny." He said, his emotions getting the best of him.

"Okay, lets move on before I start crying like a toddler." He sniffed as the rest laughed, silence falling among them. "Bean?" He asked. 

"I went to talk to Gordie, he's extremely confused and doesn't know what to believe. Kelly's with Gordie. The both of them have been speculating a lot. I think they're on our side." She said, shrugging. "Seems like everyone's just divided about it all. Grizz, what did you find out?" Grizz' eyes widened as he thought of the morning he spent at Harry's house. 

A sigh left his lips before he started talking, having to do his best to keep his voice steady.

"Campbell's got total control over Harry. When I got there, Harry looked terrible, he was shaking and kept on looking at Campbell. I mean, it's so fucking evident." He shrugged, eyes focused at the table in front of him.

"He's got a drug problem and gets his drugs from Campbell, therefore Harry will do just about anything as long as he gets his fix." Shocked faces listened carefully. "And Campbell knows very well how to take advantage of that. This whole Allie and Will thing is all made up by him. He's the brain, the one who's actually in charge." Sam's fists clenched at the words, eyes focused on Becca. 

"I told them I had to go to the bathroom, knowing Harry was waiting for his fix and I wandered around the house a bit. Allie and Will are locked in one of the rooms. She told me it's all a lie and that I have to fix it." He chuckled at that, looking down at the baby in his arms. "How the fuck am _I_ supposed to fix it." He whispered nearly to himself, disbelief evident in his voice. 

"Luke's torn. He knows it's not right. I could tell. I just don't know what made him follow their lead." He sighed, eyes looking for Sam's but they were still focused on Becca, anger radiating off of him. If Grizz hadn't been holding Eden he would've reached out to him. The next part was what was hardest to say. He knew how this was gonna get to Sam, his mind almost convincing him to keep it to himself. 

"Elle was also there." Grizz croaked out, the sight of the fragile girl sitting in the corner almost haunting his mind. Sam's eyes closed at that. Grizz waited, eyes still looking for contact. He could feel that Sam already knew what was going on. If there was anyone who knew Campbell and knew what he was capable of, it was Sam. 

"Helena?" Sam asked, nobody actually knowing what he was talking about. Sam sighed as he saw the confusion on people's faces. "Elle ran from Campbell. She stayed with Helena, then at Allie's. That's why she got herself arrested. So she wouldn't have to stay with Campbell." Becca, said as Sam signed. She still looked confused about it, as did everyone else. Grizz didn't know about any of that either. 

"I've been keeping tabs on her ever since she moved in with Campbell." The looks of confusion did not disappear at that. "Living with Campbell is like living with a bomb. You don't know when, but you just know it's bound to explode." Sam seemed done, falling back into the couch. Their shoulders touched and Sam let out another shaky breath. 

_Fuck_.

"Campbell's been hurting Elle." Grizz finally said. A series of curses were heard in the living room, everyone in shock. "She looked terrible. It was as if she was screaming at me to help her by just looking." Sam stood up abruptly, hands pulling at his hair. Grizz felt trapped as he was still holding Eden, looking at Sam in desperation. 

_We're all going to pay for this one day. We had him, and you fucking let him go._

Sam remembers saying those words to Allie, being so fucking mad at her, knowing something like this was gonna happen. It seemed perfect when they arrested Campbell at first, everyone was safe and so was Elle. He thought she finally got away from Campbell, but this time around it's probably even worse for her. 

"I knew this was gonna happen." He finally croaks out, pacing back and forth in the room. "I warned them." 

"Sam," Grizz starts. Becca interrupts him as she starts saying what Sam had started signing.

"We have to do something. We have to fix this piece of shit of a town. I'm not gonna let my brother get away we all of this. We need a plan." Everyone nodded at that, still shaken by what was told. His eyes finally turned to Grizz, hands hesitant. "What do you suggest?" He signs, Becca not bothering to speak as he does so. 

Grizz' eyes stay focused on Sam. Sam is right. They must do something about this. Sam seems ready to start an attack any second, body language radiating anger and frustration. He can see that Sam wants to do _something_. But it would be stupid to start thinking of planning anything with everyone this emotionally invested. He forces himself to look away from Sam and observe the other people in the room. 

The shocked looks on their faces are mixed with tears by some as they look for comfort from each other. 

"Let's give it a night to rest. No one is capable of thinking clearly right now. Let's just, head down to the cafeteria and have dinner. Be subtle. Okay?" Everyone nodded and Sam avoided his eyes after Grizz finished talking. He walked out of the room before anyone was able to stop him.

Grizz heard the back door close seconds later. 

"It's okay," Becca's voice snapped his eyes away from Eden as he instinctively pulled the baby closer to his body. A grin appeared on Becca's face at the action as she sat down next to him. "You go talk to him." She says, taking Eden back. 

_Fuck_.

. . . . .

 

Grizz found Sam in the garden, on his back as his arms and legs were spread widely. Short, uncontrolled breaths were heard as soon as Grizz got closer, alerting him that Sam was probably having a panic attack. 

"Hey, hey, hey," Grizz mumbled as he hurried to Sam, falling down onto his knees next to the boy. "Calm down, just breathe," He tells Sam, not actually knowing what to do. 

_Moron_. He tells himself, realizing that Sam was completely unaware of him being there as his eyes were closed. Grizz took ahold of Sam's cheeks, his eyes shooting open. A sob escaped Sam's lips as he took in the sight of Grizz, his arm coming up to cover his eyes as tears leaked out of them. 

"Fuck, Sam," Grizz mumbled, feeling tears well up in his own eyes. He put one hand behind Sam's neck and pulled him into a sitting position. "Look at me, c'mon Sam." He mumbles, squeezing the back of Sam's neck. He pulls back the arm that is covering his eyes and wipes away the tears with the sleeve of his hoodie. Their eyes meet and Grizz can actually feel his heart aching at the sight of Sam. He looks devastated.

"It's my fault," He begins, but Grizz is quick to stop him from talking. He shakes his head, taking ahold of Sam's cheeks as he talks. 

"Not your fault. Sam, this is not your fucking fault, okay?" Sam shakes his head at that, another sob leaving his mouth. Grizz pulls him into an almost awkward hug, as he's still on his knees, cradling Sam to his chest. Sam hides his faces against Grizz chest, and Grizz decides to keep talking to him, whether Sam understands him or not. 

 

He talks for minutes, talks about everything and nothing. Sam can feel the beat of Grizz' heart and the vibrations of Grizz talking. It soothes him. 

 

When Sam's sobs have quieted down and there's just tears leaking, Sam's hand reaches up to Grizz' neck. Grizz almost pulls back, purely out of instinct once Sam's hand takes ahold of his neck. He stops talking for a few seconds before he realizes what Sam is doing.

He can only feel the vibrations of Grizz talking lightly with his head to his chest. With his hand to his neck, Sam can feel every single thing.

The hand stiffens once he realizes Grizz' talking halted, so he starts talking again. He tells him about options they have to fight back, not wanting to actually share them yet but saying it out loud is helping him clear his head. 

"I'm sorry," Sam suddenly speaks up, pulling away from Grizz. "Thank you." He says, seconds later, knowing Grizz would tell him he shouldn't say sorry. Grizz just smiles down at him. 

"I think we've both cried enough to fill an ocean today." He notes, and Sam smiles at that, shrugging. "This is a great start to our relationship." Sam signs and they both chuckle. 

"Hey," Grizz starts, "We're gonna fix this, together." Sam looks away.

Grizz takes ahold of his chin, forcing Sam to look at him. "I promise." Sam takes a deep breath and nods. "Okay." 

"Let's go eat, yeah?" 

"Yeah."

_What a fucking day_. 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> another lil sum sum. if there's frizz written instead of grizz please blame my fucking autocorrect I literally had to correct it three thousand times. i really should be studying ha it's the dumb bitch juice.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hello hi i am back after a few days, very sorry about that im still in the middle of finals. this isn't much but I guess I wanted to give u something? so here that is.

A few days had passed since what was probably one of the most emotionally draining days both Sam and Grizz had ever experienced. 

Things had mostly quieted down since then, but everyone in town felt the tension hanging in the air. As Sam had said, Campbell was a bomb, and it seemed live everyone was just waiting for him to explode. 

Grizz was still looking for a way to get Allie and Will released, but he'd been just running into dead ends constantly. If they'd go public with trying to convince everyone, chances were big he'd just end up getting arrested, and that was the last thing he needed. So most of his days had been him doing the usual Guard stuff, checking up if everything was calm. Now that no one was actually doing their jobs, there was no necessity and checking up on it. The free time he had, he spent trying to help other construct a road between the free land and the town. 

Things had been quite shit for most of the people in town. The rich kids had their excessive amounts of food, luxurious homes back. Most people had headed back home, ending up feeling alone after living with so many people lately, and ended up getting hungry. The cafeteria hadn't been open since there were barely any people showing up to do their shifts anymore. Basically, the rich kids were happy, leaving everyone else to fend for themselves. It was already spiraling down a bad road and Frizz knew that someone was gonna have to step up to fix all of this shit soon enough. He just didn't know how, or who. 

He'd kind of been assigned as the leader of this little group the search party members had become, but that didn't mean he was gonna lead some kind of fucking revolution. No fucking way. People still had guns around this place, and he wasn't exactly waiting excitedly to get shot anytime soon. So no, Grizz was not about to become _that_ guy. They need Allie back. Before shit got out of hand even more. 

He hadn't seen a lot of Sam since that fuckload of a day, as he'd been busy with the baby and it was getting Grizz upset. Not upset, but, you know. Kind of upset. Mopey? Mopey. 

He didn't wanna be _that_ person in the relationship, the demanding, attention-seeking kind, but four days not seeing each other after having just started dating, and not really having any constrictions parent, work or school wise, it was a big bummer for Grizz. Of course they'd been checking up on each other daily, but it wasn't really the same. He missed Sam, and he wasn't being cocky when he said he knew Sam missed him too. 

Not actually hanging out with Sam had only made Grizz' mind wander, and he'd ended up on some pretty serious shit. 

When he had lashed out at Sam after finding out about Becca, Grizz had said something about being one of those dinosaur guys who spent their lives hidden in the closet, asking Sam if he wanted to be that kind of person. Which was actually pretty fucking stupid of him to say, as he was still the closeted one out of the two of them. And fuck how he wanted to come out, but with all the stuff that had been going on, he hadn't actually gotten to it. 

The last thing he had to do right now was draw attention to himself, he needed to stay as low-key as possible, and coming out wasn't exactly the way to do that. Also, if he were to have a conversation with Sam about this, he knew it would somehow end up biting him in the ass. Nothing was evident right now, and the last thing he needed was a fight with Sam. They'd fought and cried and resolved things enough for a year already, so piling another thing onto the ' _shit we have to deal with_ '-pile was not part of the plan. 

The positive thing about the past few days was the addition of Kelly and Gordie on the 'team'. Kelly showed her and Gordie's concern about the whole election thing to Becca, who then mentioned Grizz, knowing the two of them were trustworthy. They also told him the theory about Pfeiffer, the bus driver, and slowly but surely Grizz felt like they were actually finding some stuff out about this fucked up black-hole universe they were in.

 _Finally_.

 

. . . . .

 

It was the first meeting they were officially having as the kind of fucked up attempt of a revolutionary group they were. Also the first time Grizz would see Sam since... let's call it doom day, for dramatic purposes. 

Bean was nervous, fiddling with her hands as she kept looking out the window, as if she was doing something extremely illegal. 

"Bean," Grizz sighed, not being able to suppress a smile, "Were okay, calm down. If they barge in in any way, we just say were having a movie night, since the once at the church have been cancelled." Bean seemed to relax at that. 

"Yeah, yeah I guess that's a good plan. Yeah? Yeah. Good." She sat down on the couch, a huge sigh leaving her lips. Grizz patted her shoulder as he walked by, finding the rest of his three search party comrades in the kitchen as they prepared some food. Kelly and Gordie were already there so they were just expecting Sam, Becca and Eden.

Grizz wasn't sure why he felt kind of nervous about seeing Sam again. Perhaps some part of him still kind of felt like Sam was gonna pull out of the whole relationship any minute, so he could focus on his little family. The doorbell snapped him out of his thoughts, shaking his head as he stumbled to the door as fast as possible. He threw the door open, lightly hitting it against his head as he did so. "

"Ow." He winced, one hand going up to the spot where he'd hurt himself. A snort was heard in front of him, Sam's blue eyes sparkling at the tall boy. "Hi," He spoke softly, Becca and the stroller lurking behind him. 

"Hi," Grizz said, a smile on his lips at the sight of him. Sam stepped forward and didn't hesitate as he pulled Grizz down by his neck, pressing a kiss against his lips to then pull him into a hug.

Relief flooded through Grizz' body at the actions, a fond smile on his face as he reciprocated the love. "Missed you," Sam mumbled into his neck and Grizz had to refrain himself from squeezing the boy too hard. He raised his hands up to cup Sam's face and kissed him, once on the lips and once on his forehead. 

"Missed you so much," He said, and his heart swelled at the sight of Sam smiling at his words. 

"Hi Grizz," Becca said fondly after the two boys had let each other go. Grizz couldn't help himself as he pulled Becca into a hug as well, mumbling a hi as he did so. 

"How are you guys doing? You good? Baby good?" Becca nodded, pushing Eden's stroller into the hallway. "Both great!" 

After everyone reunited for a minute, they all sat down and the mood shifted. Bean put on a movie and paused it, just to soothe herself incase anything happened. 

"So," Grizz started, eyes darting around the room, "How the fuck are we gonna do this?" 

 

. . . . .

 

They discussed the situation, options, possible plays and outcomes for a good three hours before everyone's brain hurt so bad, that (in the words of Mickey) 'it was about to explode, and he might just eat them after he'd become a zombie'.

Or something like that.

Grizz called in a dinner break and everyone nearly sprinted towards the kitchen, leaving Sam and Grizz alone in the room. Sam hadn't been sitting next to Grizz as they both would've liked it. Most of the couches in the living room were already taken when they'd gone to take a seat, leaving one place open next to Becca, and his Dad's big chair. It was sacred to his Dad. No one ever sat in it out of respect, so it felt extremely weird for Grizz to be sitting in it. He got the charm about it though. It made him feel a bit authoritative. 

Grizz looked up to see Sam already looking at him. The redheaded boy stood up and walked over to him, one hand automatically running his hand through the loose hair that was falling in Grizz' eyes. If Frizz hadn't been putting his hair into a bun as much as he used to just so Sam would do _that_ , nobody needed to know it. 

Grizz took ahold of his free hand and softly pulled him down to sit on his lap sideways. Sam wrapped one arm around his neck, legs draping over the side of the seat. 

"How are you?" Grizz asked. Sam shrugged, his eyes were tired, body tense. "I can feel the tiredness radiating off of you." He smiled, poking Sam's cheek with his index finger. 

"Eden hasn't been sleeping," He signed, "Like, not at all. I thankfully can't hear the crying, but I've been just sitting by her crib when Becca goes to sleep to look after her." 

"Well," Grizz started, shrugging at his suggestion already. "I'm sure that if you'd ask Kelly to babysit sometime she would. I've heard her talk about it." Sam nodded, a small sense of relief flooding over him at the thought of a good night's sleep. 

"I really did miss you though." Grizz whispered, eyes focused on Sam's. A small smile appeared on Sam's face as he wrapped both arms around Grizz' neck, snuggling into it. Sam was really tired, and talking or signing wasn't something he had the energy for at the moment, the 3 hour meeting already having taken up most of his courage. Grizz pulled Sam a little closer to him, both arms wrapped around him securely. 

It was a weird thing, having someone be this close, this intimate with you. Grizz never grew up with a lot of affection, his parents giving him the occasional hug when they wouldn't see eachother for a while, or when something specific happened, so having him be so close and touchy with Sam should probably be strange, but it really wasn't. 

He was also quite aware of the fact that everyone was only a room away and could walk in on them any moment. Not that they were hiding. The only people that really knew about this were the ones that were present, and they were all totally cool with it. Grizz was just, private. Having his vulnerability just hanging around for everyone to see was what made him a little uneasy, but if that meant getting the time and affection he'd been missing from Sam, he didn't have a single fucking problem with it. 

Before he could get another word out to make Sam look at him, so they could talk, he heard a nearly soundless snore coming from Sam's mouth. Grizz couldn't help but chuckle. The boy hadn't even been in his lap for five minutes and he was already dozing off. 

Everyone came back in the room with plates in their hands, both Becca and Gordie having an extra one for Sam and Grizz. 

Grizz shrugged as all the eyes landed on him, trying to look as innocent as possible. "He asleep?" Becca asked, nodding to Sam. Grizz nodded, shrugging again. 

"He hasn't been sleeping at all, either up looking out for Eden or just incapable of sleeping because of the whole Campbell thing." She frowned at her own words, worry evident in her voice. "Thank you," She ended up saying, setting the plate down on top of Sam's legs, who was knocked the fuck out, and handed a fork to Grizz free hand. He frowned in confusion. "Thank you for what?" Becca sat down across from him as the rest was also settling down again. Becca didn't answer him, just smiled mysteriously. 

"Yall are cute as fuck." Gordie muttered, mushing down on some broccoli. The group erupted in chuckles as Gordie's face got red. "Did I say that out loud?" Grizz nodded, a huge grin on his face. 

"Oh wow, I need a girlfriend." 

Grizz started eating some of the food, one hand on Sam, one clumsily attempting to pick things of the plate in Sam's lap as he was simultaneously trying not to wake Sam. 

"Since we haven't really come up with anything, I still have one last suggestion." Grizz began, his eyes looking down, knowing no one would be very enthusiastic about it. He didn't bother whispering, knowing that Sam could feel the vibrations of him talking and that it would probably lull him into an even deeper sleep. 

"Harry and I were quite good friends when we were younger. At some point I was over at his nearly everyday, so I know his house like the back of my hand." He stopped talking and took his time to look up at the rest. He could see the worry in Bean's eyes already. 

"I also know that there's a secret entrance at the back of the house. His Dad's very paranoid about shit, so he had a tunnel made that runs underneath the ground of the garden. It starts somewhere under bushes, covered up pretty well." A chill ran down his spine at just the thought of it. He remembered walking down the tunnel with Harry one time. They'd both been excited to climb into it when they found it one day, after playing in the garden for hours. 

Instead of it being fun and adventurous, they'd both been terrified. Harry's flashlight died in the middle of the tunnel, and they were too young to have phones, let alone iPhone's with flashlights on them. Both being terrified shitless, they just followed the rest of the tunnel completely blinded and just hoping to get to the end of it.

"I reckon it would be more difficult to walk through it than it was ten years ago, I'm not even sure it's still there. But the tunnel ends inside the house. Specifically, it ends in the room where Allie and Will were hidden." Silence fell upon the room, everyone's mind obviously going a hundred miles a minute, letting the information sink in.

"So," Bean finally spoke up, breaking the silence, "What are you suggesting?" 

Grizz eyes shot up, staring straight into Bean's. 

"I'm suggesting we break in." 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hope that didn't fuckin suck... hahahahahaha i have insecurity problems


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> oooooo i just wrote down my plans for grizz' big plan lemme tell y'all I'm SO FUCKING EXCITED ABOUT IT !!!!! i literally wrote a full ass piece of paper on what grizz' plan could be and like.... i actually love it

"Grizz, fuck no!" Mickey said, saying what most of them were thinking. "That tunnel has apparently been there for years. We don't know how safe it is to go in there. It might not even exist anymore."

"Anyways, it's fucking dangerous. We can't risk losing you to something as dumb as that." Gwen said, shaking her head in frustration.

"Well what the fuck are we gonna do then? We've been sitting here for hours and we've got nothing." Kelly spoke, shocking most of them.

They all began half shouting things and reasons and protests at each other and at Grizz, so he let them. Nobody was listening to what anybody was saying, all just wanting to get out their frustrations as they 'discussed' it. 

Grizz sunk deeper into the chair, letting out a sigh as he watched it all unfold. Sam was still sound asleep in his lap, not aware of the chaos that was currently surrounding him. Grizz knew it would probably be best to have Sam alert for this conversation, but the boy hadn't slept in days. He needed it. Grizz removed the plate and fork from Sam's lap, putting it onto one of the side tables. The 'discussion' was now just a background noise as Grizz pinched the bridge of his nose, brain going a hundred miles a minute as the plan he'd been cooking up finally seemed to fall into its place. 

 _That's it._  He suddenly realized, the whole plan suddenly unfolded in his head. _Fuck yes_. 

He let his eyes wander down to Sam again, softly tapping his cheek in an attempt to wake him. 

"Hey," He whispered, kwowing it had zero effect, but doing it anyway. He blew a little bit of air on Sam's face and his eyes fluttered open. He looked up at Grizz in confusion, realizing shortly after that, that he had fallen asleep. With the sleeves of his hoodie covering his hands he rubbed at his eyes, yawning as he did so.

"How long was I asleep for?" He asked. 

"Not too long, you feel better?" Grizz replied, Sam nodding at his question. 

"Naps are good," He said out loud, a smile rising on his lips, "You're very comfortable. Squishy." 

"Hey!" Grizz gasped, shocked by Sam's words, not being able to suppress a smile as well. "I'm not squishy. I have muscles. I'm muscly." He pouted, making a laugh erupt from Sam's body. Sam hadn't paid any attention to his surroundings and the others were too invested in arguing to realize what was happening. 

"You've seen me naked, what a way to make a man feel good about himself," He fake pouted. Sam blushed at the words. 

"You are, you're just.." His eyes narrowed, looking for a way to elaborate. "Harry Styles?" Sam suddenly said, Grizz nodded, a frown on his face as he had no idea where this was going. "He's very muscular, but it looks soft?" An image of Harry Styles shirtless came to mind and Frizz couldn't help but feel flattered by the comparison. 

"Fuck yea I'm squishy." He said, his eyes wrinkling as he smiled. Sam eventually looked around him, eyes widening as he saw the chaos in front of him. He immediately looked back at Grizz in confusion.

"Hey!" He shouted, startling himself as his voice was deeper than he'd heard before, which made every single one of them jump and quiet down. 

"What's going on?" He spoke up, everyone suddenly looked at Eden as she let out a sound, alerting everyone that she was awake. Sam stood up from Grizz' lap and went to get her, knowing it was time for her to have a bottle. He sat back down on a chair in-between Becca and Grizz, Eden in his arms.

"I've got a plan." He said, seven pairs of eyes on him. 

Nobody reacted. They'd all just had a fit about this dangerous fucking thing Grizz wanted to do, and every single one of them knew that Sam would be even less pleased about it than they were. Grizz could feel that Sam was getting annoyed, jaw clenching as he looked at Becca when Grizz gave him nothing. Becca sighed and started signing what Grizz had just said. 

Sam's head immediately snapped to him, eyes wild. 

"Are you out of your fucking mind?" Sam signed as he spoke. "Who knows what Campbell will do if he sees you?" Grizz shook his head. 

"Just hear me out." He said, eyes focused on Sam. "Trust me." He nodded meaningly. 

He let out one last deep sigh, letting his stress seep out of his body for a second before he started explaining what the fuck his mind had been up to lately, praying they agreed to use some parts of the plan.

Taking his time, Grizz explained the three step plan he'd been coming up with for the past days. He'd been thinking and planning it nearly non stop over the past few days, but none of it ever really ended up making sense, giving him the feeling he was ending up nowhere with it, until now. Grizz talked for nearly an hour, explaining every single detail of the plan, even suggesting who should do what and why. He made sure none of them felt like they _had_ to do it, but elaborated on it anyway. All of them were hanging onto his every word. They went from frowning, to nodding, to shaking their head, to clenching their fists in anger. Nearly every single emotion of the book had passed by the time Grizz wrapped up his plan. 

"So?" He asked, raising one hand to scratch his hair in discomfort as they all stared at him. The room was quiet. 

Gordie was the one to break it. 

"I think you're a fucking genius." Grizz chuckled at the sentiment, shaking his head. 

"I think it could work." Kelly said, "It better fucking work." Becca muttered.

"I think there's a possibility we're gonna get ourselves killed if we do this," Gwen started, making everybody groan, "But what do we have to lose, huh?" She said with a smile, everyone grinning at her words. 

Grizz swallowed as he looked at Sam. 

 _A lot more than we used to_. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> hello!! this is not an update I'm so sorry but I just wanted to update you guys on what's probably gonna happen. 
> 
> i've written out what i'm gonna do w the story but haven't started writing it yet cos i know i wouldn't be able to stop once I got started lol and i have another final tomorrow, literally should be studying rn but i've been feeling so bad about not updating the story and i wanted you guys to know why! 
> 
> so it's coming soon, gonna start working on it tomorrow probably x
> 
> also if u have twitter leave a comment w ur @ !

will be continued ...


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> the plan commences...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hellooooo i am back with an extra long ass update. i worked on this way too long lmao it's weird how fast time goes by when you're doing this??? 
> 
> pleeeeeeease leave a comment or kudos! thank you so much for the nice messages y'all have been leaving ily 
> 
> okay enjoy bYE

A week was spent, trying to plan every detail, every minute of it, thinking of back-up plans, and back-up plans in case the back-up plan didn't work. Something was bound to go wrong at some point, of course it was. They're fuckin' teenagers trying to plan some sort of revolution. History hasn't always been kind to revolutions, or attempted ones. At least now there really isn't a history to have as they were trapped in some fucked up black hole universe. 

They tried to go unnoticed as the week went by. Everyone did their usual stuff with the usual people, meaning Grizz had to make a trip down to Harry's house every once in a while as much as he dreaded it. 

He still had to do the usual Guard stuff, which wasn't much as the system was pretty much falling apart. At some point he took matters into his own hands and spent an afternoon running around town and talking to people. They didn't suspect anything of it, as it was what The Guard had been doing for months when Allie was still leading. Also, it was a very Grizz thing to do, go around and check up on them. 

As for the shady stuff Campbell had Jason and Clark doing, he had no idea about. It was clear that Campbell wanted Grizz to stay in the dark on a lot of things, so Grizz kept all his questions about Allie and Will to himself. 

 

Luke was struggling. He'd seen it immediately that day he went to visit for the first time, and he'd seen it every day since then. Even Helena came to show her concern at some point, grabbing Grizz from the street out of nowhere. 

"What is up with Luke? What aren't you telling me?" Grizz was startled by the sudden questions, unsure of why Helena would come to him of all people. Unable to think of a response, he just gave her the most confused look and put up his hands unknowingly. Helena sighed. 

"Grizz," Helena's eyes were brimmed with tears threatening to fall, her hands gripping onto Grizz' forearms. "What is happening?" Grizz felt as if someone had just punched him in the guts, Helena's eyes begging him to tell her _something_. 

"Honestly, I have no idea. I can see it too." Her shoulders slumped at the words.

"I don't get it. I don't get any of it. Nothing makes sense anymore. Why doesn't anything make _sense_?" The tears finally fell from her eyes so Grizz took her by the hand and quickly pulled her away from the street, so no one could see them. 

"Okay, I need you to listen to me." Grizz said, his hands holding Helena's as she looked up at him in confusion. "I can't tell you a lot, but I think we both know Luke isn't in his right state of mind right now." Helena nodded. 

"Something shifted, I don't know why or what or how, but I know that I can do something. I'm gonna fix this, okay?" Helena tightened her grip on Grizz' hands, nodding as another tear fell from her eyes. "I'm gonna get you your fiancé back. I promise. I just need you to trust me, can you do that?" Instead of replying, Helena just wrapped her arms around Grizz' waist, mumbling a yes. 

"I always knew you were the cleverest one of the group." She chuckled, her voice raspy. 

"Well, it's not like it's a tough competition with Jason and Clark there." Helena laughed aloud and pulled back, looking up to Grizz with hope. 

"Thank you, Grizz." 

"Just," Grizz sighed, "Just don't tell anyone about this, okay? I mean it. Not a word. To nobody." Helena kissed her index and middle finger, looking up at the sky as she did so. 

"Swear to God." Grizz smiled a that. 

"That does mean a lot coming from you." Helena smiled at him one more time before walking off again. Grizz felt his body relax. Helena is trustworthy. Hm. 

"Helena!" Grizz called after her, the street empty. She turned around, eyes expectant. "Yeah?" Grizz motioned for her to come back, a shaky sigh leaving his lips as she neared him. 

He's known Helena for years. They've been pretty good friends even before she started dating his best friend. She knows him. What if she doesn't accept him? 

Helena looked up at him expectantly, eyes still a bit wet from before. She stayed silent, letting him take his time to form his words decently. 

"I'm gay?" He said, almost as if he was asking her a question. "And I.. I mean.. I guess I just wanted you to know that, if that's okay with you." Helena let out a giggle at his last words, hands coming up to cup Grizz' cheeks, his eyes wet and searching for any kind of reaction. 

"You're born how you are, Grizz. God made you in his image and believe me when I say that he did a pretty good job at doing it. You're wonderful whichever way you are, and whoever you love." A tear fell from Grizz' eyes, not having expected Helena to react so positively. Her thumb wiped away the tear. "You'll be fine, Grizz." She squeezed his cheeks like his Grandma used to do and he couldn't help but let out a mix of a chuckle and a sob at that. "Thank you." He whispered, pulling Helena into a hug. 

So that was that. 

 

. . . . . 

 

The week of planning and anticipation had finally come to an end. Today was gonna be the execution of Part One of the plan. 

Part One of the plan, or as Gordie loved to say 'Gladiator Grizz' magical escapes plan" _(honestly what the fuck Gordie)_ was probably everyones' least favorite part. It involved too many of them, meaning that the chances of someone getting hurt was bigger and that's what Grizz wanted to avoid at all costs. But it was _his_ stupid fuckin' plan, so it was _his_ responsibility. Also they sort of crowned Grizz leader pretty early on, making him feel like a cult leader or some shit, most of the time. 

He hadn't liked the thought of it when he came up with it, but it was probably the biggest shot they got at starting this right.

Grizz had felt the tension in the house the second he woke up. Nervous mutters were heard in the hallway, people probably venting to each other to get rid of some of the stress. When he arrived in the kitchen he felt everyones eyes on him expectantly, and he couldn't refrain himself from rolling his eyes in frustration and clenching his fists as he got some milk out of the fridge, his back to them.

 _Being a stupid ass leader fucking_ sucks _. What the fuck do they expect me to say? I'm not fucking Captain America or some shit. If I were an Avenger I'd be Tony. Smart but also stupid as hell, in the best way. God. Hey. I never got to see Endgame? Fuck!_

Grizz got snapped out of his thoughts when he heard a not-so-subtle cough behind him. _Right_. 

"Morning," he started, honestly not knowing what the appropriate thing to say was. _Oh god am I really gonna have to do this?_

A baby's crying voice made everyone's eyes snap away from Grizz and to the door, where Becca was holding Eden with a smile on her face. "Hey guys!" Grizz had never been more happy in his life to hear a crying baby. "Thank fuck," He mumbled, smiling at Becca. His eyes wandered behind Becca to see where Sam was. 

"He's still sleeping, stayed up all night watching Eden again." Becca said, knowingly, "That's why I'm surprisingly happy on a day like this." The presence of Becca and Eden seemed to calm most of them down a bit, much to Grizz' relief. The silence in the kitchen broke into the usual chit chat as everyone got back to their breakfast. 

"Coffee?" Grizz asked Becca, who nodded as she walked over to him. He turned on the espresso machine and looked down at Becca who had handed Eden over to Gordie. She was looking up at him with a warm smile. 

"You're doing a great job, you know." She said, eyes kind. "I can tell you don't really like this kind of leadership and responsibility, but you're doing a really great job."

Grizz didn't know what to say to that. Ever since the whole 'Becca had a baby and at first I thought it was my boyfriend's baby'-fiasco, Grizz hadn't really known how to act around Becca. Actually, he had taken a slight dislike towards her at some point. Given his crush on Sam, he'd been looking at him quite a lot over the past few years. He knew she was a good person, and a really good friend to Sam but ever since shit got fucked up, he'd notice them more. It happened often when he found himself looking at them. Sam signing to Becca, a smile on his face, just to get a snark back and then seeing Sam's face fall. Grizz hadn't known at the time that Becca had been pregnant, and that it was probably a combination of stress, concern and hormones making her react like that. But still, it had, without him wanting to, given Grizz a slight disliking to Becca.

"W-What?" 

"I just, I've seen how uncomfortable you get when they like, ask you what to do. They really look up to you and I can tell it makes you feel uncomfortable." Grizz just frowned at her and then nodded, a sigh leaving his lips. 

"I like having an opinion and being able to express it, but taking the lead just isn't my cup of tea, I guess." Becca smiled at his words, happy he was talking to her. 

"Well, you're doing great either way." She said and before Grizz knew it, Becca had her arms wrapped around him. His arms involuntarily shot up in surprise, unsure of what to do. When Becca didn't budge, Grizz just hugged her back, his touch soft as if she would break in his arms if he made the wrong move. 

_So many hugs lately._

As ridiculous as it sounded, Grizz was actually glad to hug Becca. He was a hugger and he'd always been one. Being able to hug people, and girls, without them being way too excited about it was actually nice. He kind of melted into the hug and pulled Becca closer. 

"You're pretty fuckin' great, you know that?" He whispered just loud enough so that Becca could hear. "A badass bitch." He chuckled, pulling back from the hug and looking down to see Becca smiling widely at him. Without hesitating, he pressed a kiss into Becca's hair and handed her the cup of coffee. 

"Oh come on!" He heard from the other side of the room, the all too familiar voice making both Becca's and his head snap to the sound. Sam stood in the doorway, faking a pout. "I knew you two would gang up on me." He said as he stepped in front of them. Grizz laughed easily at Sam's words, the tension he woke up with leaving his body a little bit. 

"Hey you." Grizz said, wrapping his arms around the neck of the smaller boy and pulling him into his chest, pressing a kiss on his forehead. Sam wrapped his arms around Grizz' waist and closed his eyes as he took a deep breath, sighing in happiness. "I missed you." He spoke, scratching Grizz' back twice as he did so, not bothering to move to see Grizz response. 

"Missed you too," Grizz mumbled into Sam's hair, just because he could and he returned the two scratches softly at the nape of Sam's neck. Grizz realized he had forgotten Becca was still standing in front of him when she patted his shoulder and went to talk to the rest. Feeling Sam melt into his arms more and more, Grizz knew that Sam was nearly falling asleep standing up. He tapped Sam's cheek in order to get his attention. Sam's eyes fluttered open, looking up at Grizz tiredly. 

"Becca said you were sleeping in? Did you?" Sam shook his head.

"I wanted to see you."

"Sam, you gotta sleep. You have the rest of the day to see me." With his arms around Sam, he was unable to sign and it made him feel bad for about a second until he realized Sam's eyes were barely open. His hands left Sam's shoulders and moved up to his face, slapping his cheeks playfully. Sam's eyes napped open again.

"You. Sleep." Grizz said, to keep it simple and easy enough for Sam's brain to still grasp.  

"Grizz?" He heard Becca's voice call, head snapping up to look at her only to realize the kitchen was empty and the noise was coming from the living room. "Can you please try to get him to sleep? It's been over 24 hours since he did and he refuses to listen to me." Grizz rolled his eyes at the information, looking down at Sam again as he was still holding his cheeks, the redheaded boy's eyes already drooping again.

"Got it!" He answered Becca and poked Sam's cheek again. "Come on." He spoke, trying to get Sam to follow him. Sam stayed put, not moving an inch. "Where we going?" He muttered, bringing one hand up to rub at his eyes as a yawn left his mouth.

"Are you shitting me?" He muttered, looking down at the boy. Sam dropped his forehead against Grizz shoulder and snuggled into it. "Jesus Christ." He sighed, his hand on the back of Sam's neck as he went over his options. They appeared to be minimal. Sam was clearly willing to sleep standing up if it meant not having to walk, but Grizz wanted the boy to have some actual decent rest, and so did Becca. The day was gonna be hard enough as it was, a lack of sleep would definitely not make it better, at all. 

"I'm really gonna have to carry him huh," Grizz muttered to himself. As he did so, he took Sam from under his arms and raised him onto the kitchen island. The smaller boy's eyes shot open at the movement. 

"Hm?" He just 'said' as he looked at Grizz in confusion. "You're too lazy to walk, are you?" Grizz asked, and Sam just shrugged, wanting to lean back against something but there was nothing there, nearly making him fall. Grizz quickly took ahold of his arms and pulled him back. 

"Come on, freckles. Participation required." He wrapped Sam's arms around his neck and Sam's legs around his waist, pulling him to the edge of the counter and picking him up. Sam's head cuddled into his neck, surprisingly enough still doing an effort to keep his arms and legs wrapped around Grizz, whose one hand was at his back, the other supporting his butt. The walk through the living room should have been embarrassing to Grizz, but it wasn't at all. 

"Seriously? I try to get him to sleep for a whole day and with you it works in a few minutes?" Becca spoke. 

"I'm not sure what that says about my company," He chuckles, making the rest giggle as well. "I think we need to have a chat about our relationship." Grizz fake sighs as if he were disappointed and then he continues his way upstairs. 

By the time he lays Sam down on his bed, the boy is already asleep. Grizz takes off the boy's shoes, socks, pants and jacket, leaving him in just his shirt. Sam being as tired as he is sleeps through the whole thing. Grizz grabs a book from his shelf and settles him besides Sam, who almost as if it was his instinct rolls over to Grizz and cuddles into his side. 

 

That's how Grizz spends the next two hours reading his book and cuddled up with Sam, occasionally running a hand through Sam's hair. Becca calls him down for lunch and so he wakes Sam up. The boy stirs awake, attempting to hide himself. Grizz waits till the he has come to his senses, scratching the nape his Sam's neck as he does so. The boy eventually raises his head to look at Grizz, one hand sleepily rubbing his eye as he looks up at Grizz in confusion. 

"Huh." He says, sitting up in the bed. He looks down at his undressed state, eyes finding Grizz'. "Did you take off my clothes?" He asks as he signs. Grizz nods, cheeks heating up. _Shit. Should I not have done that? Is that rude? Fuck._

"Wait, did you carry me upstairs?" He asks, eyes wide. Grizz nods, Sam's cheeks heating up this time. "Like a little baby." Grizz teases, a laugh leaving his mouth as he sees Sam's face react to his words. He receives a small shove and goes to stand up, throwing Sam a pair of his sweats, who stands up to put them on. Grizz waits by the door, hearing all kind of no sense making mumbles leaving Sam's lips as he pulls on the pants. The boy walks up to where Grizz is stood, still muttering nonsense. 

"What?" Grizz asks him. Sam shakes his head as if to say 'you would never understand' and then opens the door, walking downstairs and into the kitchen, his appetite clearing catching up on him. Grizz walks behind him in confusion as to what just happened and watches as Sam does his thing, making a quick sandwich as he smiles at the people around him, taking a look at Eden to check up on her and his eyes eventually finding Becca's, the same look from upstairs on his face again. Sam starts signing. 

Grizz can catch a few things here and there. 

 _Carry? Baby?_ Sam's hands work way too fast for him to understand anything other than that, his cheeks heating up as Becca grins. _Cute. Don't worry._  That's all he manages to get from Becca. Sam looks frustrated for a second, making his movements more hesitant therefore also making it easier for Grizz to follow. He'd been catching up on the ASL book all week, and Grizz was a quick student, thank god, otherwise he would't have understood what Sam said. 

 _He's so fucking tall. He carried me, Becca. Carried me. Like a koala. Fucking strong. And these fucking pants are so big on me. So tall!_ Becca started laughing and Sam's cheeks only heated up more. His eyes went back to his sandwich, his mind away for a second. 

"Becca," Grizz said, "Tell him that if he's really that worried about the sweatpants being too big or me being too tall he's going to have an even bigger problem with shirts and hoodies. He'll drown in them." Becca rolled her eyes in amusement and waited until Sam looked back at her to do as Grizz had asked. Sam's eyes widened as he got the message, his eyes shooting to Grizz. 

"You understood that?" He signed as if it was a test. Grizz nodded, raising his hands and slowly replying. 

"I have been... reading... often." He signs carefully. "Crazy... what the... correct book.. will do." Sam nearly facepalms at his words. 

"My gossiping days with Becca are over." He signs and pouts, his heart actually beating like crazy at the thought of Grizz actually learning sign language just to be able to talk to him... _in his language._

 

_. . . . ._

 

 

Everyone spent the rest of the day relaxing and hanging around. Sam got some more sleep and Grizz finished his book or at least he tried to do so.

They were only planning on starting Part One of the plan at around 6pm. By that time everyone they were trying to 'target' will have let down their guard a bit, getting hungry and tired. Gwen thought it was dumb. Gordie argued that it was human nature, and that it was actually really smart. 

So around a quarter to 6pm, everyone huddled together in the living room to go over the plan one more time. Grizz was sat on the middle of the couch, everyone sat around him as if he were Santa Claus. Some were on the floor just so they'd ben closer, the other couches long forgotten. Grizz just guessed it was a comfort thing. He cleared his throat and started talking. 

"Sam goes inside at around a quarter past 6. He tries to talk to Campbell, he just starts asking questions, anything that will keep Campbell occupied." He swallowed at the thought of Sam having to be all alone with his psychopath brother. "Knowing Campbell, he'll either be dismissive or intrigued. You know what to do, right?" Sam nodded, their eyes connecting. Grizz stayed quiet for a few seconds, trying to say whatever he was thinking with his eyes. A small smile rose on Sam's lips and so Grizz continues. 

"I'll go in five minutes later, go tell the rest of The Guard about me, that'll keep them occupied for a while." It was weird to say it to that many people, even though they'd seen him with Sam. It was still weird to finally be able to say something he was embarrassed for even thinking of years previous to that. 

"By that time, the house should be unguarded expect for Harry, so that's where Kelly comes in. Go check on him and see what kind of state he's in. You know what to do either way?" Kelly nodded, confirming.

"Mickey and Bean, you guys keep everyone up to date from the opposite of the street. Don't get caught and whatever happens, do not go inside. Got that?" The duo nodded at Grizz' stern tone. 

"If we can confirm that the house is clear, and everyone is occupied, Gordie and Gwen can take the tunnel and check if it's still usable. Now, are you absolutely sure you want to do this?" Gwen nearly rolled her eyes at the question. Grizz had asked it over a dozen times the past week. When they came up with the plan Grizz had suggested he'd be the one to go down the tunnel, as he was the only one who knew where it was and knew what it was like. Also, he was very aware of how fucking dumb and dangerous it was to take a tunnel that had been there for years, maybe even decade's. Surprisingly enough, Gwen immediately volunteered to do it, Gordie suggesting he'd go with her. Grizz was very amendment they weren't gonna do it, but when Gwen brought up his height and argued that he'd probably have to crawl or some shit, Grizz didn't really have anything to counter back. 

"Grizz, for the hundredth time, we got this." Grizz nodded, worry evident on his face. 

"Okay, well... I guess that's it?" Everyone nodded, silence falling upon the room. _Oh Jesus fuck I'm gonna have to do a fucking motivational speech. I'm not fucking Captain America._  

"Listen," he starts, extremely unsure of where the fuck he was gonna go with this. "When I first elaborated the plan to you guys, Gwen said 'What do we have to lose?'." Grizz' hands were fidgeting as he spoke, not really giving off the whole 'leader vibe'. 

"I think we've all got a lot more to lose than we think we do. I know I do." He didn't allow himself to look up at Sam. "So yes, we do have something to lose. But we also can't let this thing go any further. This is something we have to do. Not just for ourselves, but for Allie, and Will, and everyone in this town. It’s not about how much we lost, it’s about how much we have left." Silence filled the room after Grizz finished talking. People seemed satisfied with his words. 

"Did you-" Gordie started, and Grizz closed his eyes, his hands coming up to cover his face in embarrassment, knowing Gordie had realized. "Did you just quote Tony Stark?" Amusement was evident tin his tone, Grizz groaning. Laughs were heard in the room and Grizz uncovered his eyes. "The Endgame trailer of all things." Gordie laughed. 

"I didn't think anyone would realize!" Laughs were even louder now, Grizz' cheeks heating up. "It worked though, didn't it? I thought it was fitting." 

"You're an idiot." Kelly laughed, shaking her head. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> i promise not every chapter will have either grizz or sam crying they really have been a lot huh????? we love boys who are vulnerable and in touch with their emotions!


	12. Part One

Sam walked up the steps of Harry's house and immediately received a frown from Clark, who was sitting guard. "What are you doing here?" He asked, standing up and covering the front door. 

"I need to talk to my brother." Clark stared at him suspiciously for a few seconds, before getting out his phone and sending a message. He intimidatingly _or at least in an attempt of being_ _intimidating_ played with the baseball bat he was holding. Please. Sam has been living with a psychopath for years, did he really think a baseball bat was gonna scare him? 

Campbell suddenly opened the door, a scowl on his face as he saw Sam. 

"What do you want." He barked, trying to get Sam to leave, just like he'd expected. 

"We need to talk." He spoke. Campbell huffed and went to close the door. 

"Campbell." Sam spoke, his eyes connecting with Campbell's as he signed. 

_It's about the letters. You know what I can do._

Campbell's eyes turned to rage, walking down the steps of the stairs and grabbing Sam by the hood, dragging him inside and into the office. 

"What the fuck?" Campbell signed, not talking. _Oh wow, the only nice thing about talking to his brother was that everything was signed and he didn't have to bother lipreading. How ironic._  

And so Sam started executing his part of the plan, keeping Campbell occupied as he was completely unaware of how the rest of them were doing. 

 

. . 

 

 

Instead of a frown like Sam got, Clark actually smiled a bit when he first spotted Grizz. His face quickly fell again when he realized he wasn't supposed to be excited. 

"Hey man," Grizz said, stepping up the stairs and shaking Clark's hand. 

"What are you doing here?" He asked for the second time in thirty minutes, not suspicious enough to think anything of the sudden visits. Of course, he'd never suspect Grizz and Sam of working together, as he didn't even know they were friends. 

"I really need to talk to you guys. Luke and Jason as well." Clark looked at Grizz in concern, dropping his guard and grabbing Grizz' shoulder. 

"Is everything okay?" Grizz couldn't help but smile at Clark's concern. "I'm okay. It's just something I really have to talk to you guys about." Clark dropped the baseball bat by the door and walked him and Grizz inside without thinking. He led him to the living room, where Luke and Jason were discussing something. They stopped talking as soon as they saw Grizz walk in. 

"Grizz needs to talk to us." Clark started as they both sat down in front of Luke and Jason. The two boys frowned as well, more suspicious than Clark had been. 

"It's important." He spoke, his eyes honest and hands fidgety. Even though this was all part of a plan, he still was about to come out to his friends. It might change their whole opinion on him, and he honestly had no clue if any of them were homophobic. A shaky breath left his lips, his mind worrying about Sam, who was also in the house. They better fucking pull this off. 

"Okay. I'm just gonna say what I have to say, I guess?" The three boys frowned at him, shuffling closer without them being aware of doing it. 

"I'm gay." Grizz said, eyes finally looking up. His three friends were all looking at him with unreadable expressions on his face, head tilted in silence. Grizz' eyes flickered in-between the three of them, waiting for any sort of reaction. It stayed like that for what felt like ages. 

"You're... gay?" Jason started, eyes narrowed as he looked at Grizz, breaking the silence. 

"What do you mean you're gay?" Clark said, confusion all over his face. "You've been with more girls than I have?" The disbelief was evident in his voice. Luke remained quiet, just looking at Grizz. 

"Yeah, well. I guess I thought I could convince myself into liking girls. I don't know. I don't really get it either." Grizz spoke as Jason sighed, trying to form sentences. 

"Since fucking when? What? We showered together. I've seen your dick, you've seen mine." Grizz had expected this to come up. 

"Oh please," he huffed, "You guys are like my brothers. Believe me, I'm not attracted to any of you." Jason seemed more offended by that than by the fact that he thought Grizz _was_ attracted to him. 

"What? Are you saying you don't think I'm hot?" Grizz let out a genuine laugh at that. 

"I come here to tell you I'm gay and you're worried about whether or not I dig you?" His three friends start laughing. Grizz lets his eyes wander to Luke, who had been quiet. 

"Luke?" He ends up saying, knowing the guy wasn't gonna speak up. Luke was his best friend. Fuck. If there was anyone that he didn't want to lose because of this, it was Luke. He reached out to Sam, took the fuckin' leap because of what Luke had said to him when they picked out a ring for Helena.

The guy just looked down at his hands, picking at the raw skin of his palms. "How long have you known?" He eventually said, eyes finally connecting with Grizz'. Grizz shrugged. 

"Long enough." Luke's look stayed, obviously wanting him to elaborate. "About three years." Grizz mumbled, eyes insecure. Luke's stare didn't leave his face, Grizz could feel it. 

"Why didn't you come talk to me?" The hurt in Luke's voice was what made Grizz look up again. Luke's eyes were set in a frown, but Grizz could see the emotions he was trying to hold back in his eyes. "I wish you would've come talk to me." Grizz had not expected this reaction at all.

"I mean, I guess I didn't think I could? You don't know who's homophobic here, you know." Luke shook his head at that. 

"Come on man!" Clark said, patting Grizz on the back. "We got you. I don't care who you do and don't wanna fuck. Jesus, I thought you were gonna say you were sick or something." Grizz couldn't help but smile.

"So you're okay with it?" He asked hesitantly. 

"Of course? We can't lose the one with the most braincells around here," Jason said, smiling at him. Luke just stood up and went to sit beside Grizz, wrapping an arm around his shoulder. They shared a knowing smile and Grizz felt a weight being lifted off his shoulders.

"Thanks you guys." He said, a big smile on his face.

"So," Clark begun, Grizz already knowing where this was heading, "How do you have sex, huh?" He groaned out loud but knew he was gonna have to go through the whole questionnaire, it _was_ part of the plan after all. 

 

. . 

 

 

Kelly took a deep breath. She'd just received a message that everything seemed to be clear at the front door, making it safe for her to go in.

 _Come on. You delivered a fucking baby._ You _can do this._

She tightened her ponytail, took another deep breath and walked up the stairs of the house as quiet as possible, opening and shutting the door quietly. The entrance hall was empty, the soft sounds of Grizz talking and chuckling was heard from the living room. A smile appeared on her face at that, it seemed like Grizz' coming out had gone well.

The door of the office was shut, knowing Sam and Campbell were in there. She tiptoed upstairs to Harry's room, the beating of her heart ringing in her ears. 

The door to Harry's room was opened just a crack, loud snoring coming from inside of it. Kelly looked through the crack and saw the remains of white powder on the table, Harry asleep in the couch in front of it. Kelly's heart broke at the sight. Harry had always been important to her, she'd always cared for him, and seeing him like this really was like taking a blow to the stomach. She had to force her feet to move away from the door. 

When she turned around, she came eye to eye with Elle, who was already opening her mouth to yell out Campbell's name. In panic, Kelly took ahold of Elle's head and put her hand over her mouth, silencing the girl immediately. 

"Hey, hey!" She whisper yelled, pulling Elle further away from Harry's room. Kelly felt more powerful than she ever had as she spoke to Elle, her eyes glaring into Elle's.

"How the fuck of you want to live? Trapped in a house with a psychopath who's abusing you? Or do you actually want to have a life and live it?" Elle's screams died down, her eyes watering at Kelly's words. 

"We know what he's doing to you. We can help." Elle's grip from Kelly's arm fell and she was almost slumped in Kelly's grip. "So what's it gonna be?" 

 

. . 

 

 

"Gordie? Gwen? It's go time." Bean's voice said from the other end of the phone. Gwen's grip on the map Grizz had drawn out tightened, stress suddenly freezing her body. The pair was stood in the backyard of the house next to Harry's house. It used to be owned by an old couple without any children, so nobody from New Ham was staying in it. 

"Hey," Gordie spoke up, taking ahold of Gwen's hand. "You got this, okay? You spent weeks in the woods, if you can do that, this is easy-peasy-lemonsqueezy." Gwen chuckled at his words, muttering 'Idiot,' as they walked up to the garden of Harry's house. It was a big garden, and if what Grizz' map said was true and the tunnel started where he thought it did, it should be around 300 feet long. 

They started pulling away vegetation from the ground looking for an entrance to the tunnel. After a good three minutes of searching, Gwen found a plate of steel. "Here!" She alerted Gordie. It took both of them to actually get the thing to open, and when they did, they were met with a mufty smell.  

"Should we have thought about oxygen?" Gwen asked, worried. "I think we should be fine." Gordie said, but he wasn't really sure whether Gwen was right or not. 

"Come on, let's go." He said before he could change his mind about this. They turned on the camping lights on their heads and the flashlights in their hands, and lowered themselves into the tunnel, not bothering to close it. The tunnel was bigger than they'd expected. They had prepared themselves for an actual tiny crawling tunnel from what they had heard of Grizz' experience. it was just high enough for them to not have to bend down, Gordie's hair flattened by the top of of the tunnel. 

"Huh," Gwen muttered, looking around. It was also broader than she'd expected. "This is not too bad, is it?" They started walking at a steady pace and reached the end soon enough. They remained silent, not sure of where they were actually ending up. Gordie carefully grabbed onto the metal bars that were serving as chairs and put his ear against the wood at the top of the stairs. He almost cried in happiness when he softly heard Allie telling Will she was losing hope, meaning that yes, it was the right room and yes, they were the only ones in there. 

Gordie gave Gwen a thumbs up and heard her sigh in relief. He softly knocked against the wood and immediately heard the conversation halt. He knocked again, hearing Allie whisper in panic. He raised his one arm, the other hand gripping onto the stairs and attempted to push the wood up. When it finally shifted, Gordie took another step up the metal bars and pushed his head through the hole to see Allie and Will. 

"Hey guys." He whispered, a big smile on his face, barely holding back his tears of relief. Allie's tears fell as a smile broke onto her face. 

"Gordie, you bastard." Will chuckled, his eyes also relieved. 

 

. . .

 

Becca was pacing through the house nervously with Eden in her arms in an attempt to calm herself down. It was 8pm, nobody was back yet and it was driving her insane. It had been nearly two hours since they started the plan. Sam was the first to go in there and still wasn't back. 

"What the fuck is taking them so long?" She mumbled to herself, putting Eden back down in her crib. She was on the verge of tears, the tension even throwing off Eden, who started whining in her crib at the vibe Becca was giving off. 

The front door shut and Becca sprinted towards it. Sam was stood in the entrance, leaning against a wall with an exhausted look on his face.

"Thank God," Becca threw her arms around him, her heart beating a hundred miles an hour. Sam hugged her back, obviously needing the comfort. She led him into the living room, sitting down next to him. 

"Where's the rest? Have you heard from anyone?" She signed. Sam shrugged. 

"I didn't see anyone. Got there, we went into the office and nobody entered besides me and Campbell. I didn't see anyone on the way out, but Clark was sitting there. I have no idea if Kelly got in an out unnoticed. I don't know anything." He looked sad, worried and just completely defeated. Becca didn't ask anymore questions and just took his hand. The door shut again, revealing Kelly along with Gordie and Gwen who looked like they just cleaned a chimney. 

"Everything went well." They all revealed, bringing a huge relief to both Sam and Becca. The only ones missing now were Grizz, Bean and Mickey. They spent the next ten minutes waiting impatiently, Sam's nervousness making his body hurt. 

_What if Campbell saw Grizz, what if he took out his anger on him? What if his friends were dicks and hurt him?_

He was staring at the ground with a dead look, feeling like he was gonna burst out of his skin. Becca nearly punched him in the leg when she heard the door shut and Grizz walked in. Sam printed across the room at the sight of him and wrapped his arms around Grizz. His whole body hurt at the mix of emotions. His entire encounter with Campbell had been hell, even worse than he'd expected it to go. His worrying about Grizz on top of that had been pushing him over the edge. Sam quickly pulled back to look at Grizz' face. 

"They were absolutely great. Nothing to worry about." Sam sighed in relief, pressing a kiss onto Grizz' lips. Grizz hands reached down to cup Sam's cheeks. "Are you okay?" He asked worriedly, hoping he'd get a better answer than he was expecting. Sam's eyes said it all. Grizz' skin crawled at that. He didn't need Sam to put into words how bad it had been. 

"Fuck." Grizz mumbled, pulling Sam into his chest. Sam had to keep himself from breaking down with all his might, trying to control his breathing as his hands held onto Grizz as if he was the last thing in the world. Grizz' eyes met Becca, who had tears streaming down her face. Bean and Mickey walked in, the smiles on their faces immediately falling at the sight of Sam. They respectfully walked past them and sat down with the rest of the group, everyone remaining silent.

Grizz pulled Sam's body out of sight of the living room and tried to get Sam to look at him. Sam's cheeks were dry, his eyes bloodshot as he was keeping himself from crying. "Hey." Grizz said, hands on Sam's cheeks as he caressed them with his thumbs. "You want to go upstairs?" He asked, his voice uneven at the sight of Sam. 

Sam shook his head no, eyes looking up at the ceiling as he let out a shaky breath. "Are you sure?" Sam nodded now, bringing his sleeves up to his wet eyes and let out another deep breath. Grizz pressed a kiss onto his head and let himself be guided into the living room, sitting down side by side with Sam, everyone's eyes on him.

"How did it go?" He asked nervously, hands intertwined with Sam's. 

Surprisingly, Sam was the one who spoke. 

"I kept him in the office from when I got there to when I left. Nobody came in and he never went out. As far as I know, he didn't suspect a thing." Everyone sighed at that, keeping Campbell away from everything had been the main priority. They all seemed to realize it had cost Sam quite a bit to do so. Grizz squeezed his hand and began talking. 

"I kept the guys busy for about an hour and a half, Clark eventually realized he wasn't on guard anymore and went to sit outside again about fifteen minutes before I left." Grizz said, expectant eyes looking for more. "They were cool, by the way. Everything went great." Another sigh of relief flooded everyone. "Kelly?" Grizz asked. 

"Harry was knocked out, so that wasn't a problem." Everyone nodded, "I did get caught by Elle." A string of swear words was heard in the room. "I had a talk with her," Grizz widened his eyes at the tone Kelly had said that. "She's not snitching. I got some information out of her that could be useful for Part Two and Three." Kelly looked smug, a small smile creeping onto her face. "I got out before Clark got back to his guard." 

Gordie seemed unable to wait for his turn to talk and just dived right into it. "Tunnel was perfect, end ups exactly where you said it would, Will and Allie are fine and everything went just as planned." He smiled widely, and everyone couldn't help but do the same. 

"Fuck." Grizz muttered, a hand reaching up to run through his hair, "Did we really pull that shit off?" Everyone laughed. 

"I guess we did, huh?"


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> a quick lil tb into time to ease myself back into the story

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> it's been a whole ass month! sorry about that??? the society got renewed! yay!

The bell rang, alerting everyone that class was over and that it was time for lunch. Grizz sighed, shoving his books into his backpack after writing down his last notes. Luke was busy discussing his after school plans with Helena while Grizz waited for him.

A loud laugh caught his attention, head snapping towards the sound. Sam Eliot was clutching his stomach as he laughed at something Becca Gelb had said. It was weird, thinking of them and still saying their last name in his head. They'd been going to the same school for years now, literally growing up with eachother but he never really talked to them. It was the whole jock thing, and Grizz hated it.

Over the past years he'd been doing his absolute best not to get put into the "just a jock"-box, and he'd like to think he's been doing good at it. He's always hated the stereotype of jocks being dicks with no actual brains, and that's why it was so important to him to be more than that. Overall he thinks he's doing a good job at that, as no one is actually afraid to talk to him and people don't cover away from him when he walks through the halls. He wasn't even sure that was an actual thing or just something he saw in the movies. 

A tap on his shoulder pulled Grizz away from his thoughts, Luke now standing next to him and Helena long gone. "Hey man, you coming?" 

"Huh? Where?" Grizz mutters, eyes creeping back to where Sam Eliot was still standing. 

"Uh... Lunch?" Luke says, eyes following whatever it was that Grizz was so distracted by. "You coming' or not?" Grizz eventually nodded and followed Luke out of the classroom, frown on his face. 

It sucked. It sucked so fuckin' bad. 

All Grizz wanted was to spend some time with Sam, get to know him, maybe talk to him for longer than the usual 5 seconds in which the only thing he can say is 'hey'.

He'd tried it once, you know, to start a conversation. 

Sam had been sitting in the bleachers, nose in a book as he was waiting for Becca to show up. Grizz' last period before lunch every Friday was Gym, which Becca was in as well and so every week Sam would wait for Becca to finish so they could have lunch together. It was awfully cute of him to do so and Grizz could never help himself and ended up looking at the boy for a good minute before walking inside as well. Sam never noticed the eyes that were on him, always too engrossed in the book he'd been reading that week. 

After weeks of just _looking_ (which Grizz realized _was_ kind of creepy), he finally took a chance and walked up to Sam. 

"Hey," He had said, when he finally stood next to Sam, but no reaction came. Realization hitting him, Grizz had nearly punched himself in the face when he remembered Sam couldn't fucking hear him. 

_Seriously, dumbass?_

He'd ended up softly tapping his shoulder, making Sam nearly jump out of his skin. 

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry!" Grizz had said with wide eyes, one hand resting on Sam's shoulder in an attempt to ground him. Guilt wrenched Frizz gut as he realized he kind of fucked up there. 

"It's okay," Sam had smiled, his heartbeat slowing back down again. He looked up at Grizz, eyes curious as to what had brought him here. Grizz just smiled back as he stood there, forgetting to speak. 

"Oh, right!" 

_Get you shIT together, what the fuck?_  

Grizz sat down next to Sam and pointed at the book that was in Sam's hands.

"What are you reading?" He asked when he knew Sam's eyes were on him. Sam was about to open his mouth to talk to him, an easy smile on his face as he seemed excited to talk about it, when he heard Becca's voice yelling Grizz' name. 

"Hey! Grizz! Leave him alone!" The fact that Grizz' neck had nearly snapped away from Sam had obviously caught his attention, a frown fixated on Becca's face now. 

"I was just asking what he's reading?" Grizz mumbled in confusion, looking at Becca as she grabbed Sam by the arm, pulling him away. 

"Stay away from him." Becca had snapped, dragging the redheaded boy behind her who looked at Grizz apologetically. 

"What the fuck?" Grizz had whispered to himself, running a hand through his hair. 

_Well, there went that stupid attempt, god dammit._

 

Grizz had done exactly what Becca had told him to, now even scared to say hey to the boy, who almost looked pained when he saw the hesitation on Grizz' face.

 

\- - - 

 

Months later, when their world had literally been turned upside down, Grizz had asked Sam about that day. 

 

"Seriously, what was that?" Grizz spoke after he had reminded Sam of the occurrence. Sam's legs were thrown over Grizz', their sides pressed together as they sat on Grizz' bed. Grizz' arm was thrown over Sam's shoulder, bright eyes looking up at his now boyfriend. 

"I'd apparently been talking about you too much to Becca, and she was worried that you getting friendly with me was gonna get my hopes up." He explained, a look of confusion on his face. 

"Why were you talking about me, what's too much?" Sam rolled his eyes at the slow realization Grizz had, his hand coming up to push back the hair that had slipped from his hood. 

"I had a crush on a straight boy, or at least what I thought was a straight boy," Sam wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, a loud laugh escaping Grizz' lips. 

"Oh my god, that's why she told me to stay away from you." Sam shrugged. 

"She was looking out for me, I guess. I did get really mad afterwards." A small frown appeared on his face as his voiced had cracked, a hand reaching for his throat. 

"You okay? Been talking too much." Grizz looked down at the boy in worry, Sam's eyes fixed on Grizz' lips. "You can sign, you know. I understand most of it." A soft look replaced Sam's frown, one hand reaching for the arm that was around his shoulders, their fingers intertwining. Sam nuzzled his face into Grizz' neck, a happy sigh leaving his lips. 

"Thank you," he whispered, pressing a soft kiss under Grizz' jaw. 

_Yeah_ , Grizz thought as he closed his eyes and snuggled closer, _some things are definitely worth waiting for._

 


	14. Chapter 14

Grizz was sure of it, they'd pushed their luck on Step One of the plan and everything was gonna start going downhill from here, he could feel it. 

"Grizz!" Becca nearly yelled, making the boy come to a halt from all the pacing he was doing. "I've fucking had it with all this pacing, you can't make yourself crazy like this!" The sound of Eden whimpering was heard in the living room, alerting them that she was awake. A sigh left Grizz' lips. 

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry." Grizz starts, hands on his hips. "I just, it all went too well, you know?" 

"Uh, did you forget about the part where Sam nearly tortured himself being in the same room as Campbell for that long? It didn't go so well for everyone." The tall boy's heart dropped at her words, remembering how devastated Sam had looked when he came back. Becca caught Grizz' apologetic look and walked over to him with Eden in her arms, handing her over to him. 

"It's okay. It's gonna be okay." Her eyes were soft, reassuring, as Grizz sat down in his Dad's recliner with Eden tucked safely against his chest. "Talking about Sam, when's he coming back from the library?" A glimpse at the clock on the wall told her that it was a quarter to six. 

"Told me he should be back by right about now." Becca shrugged, making her way to the kitchen to heat up some milk for Eden. "He probably got lost in another book, don't worry about it."

 

* * * 

 

"Look who we've got here," Campbell muttered to himself, placing a foot on top of one of the dozen books Sam had laid out on the floor in front of him. Sam's eyes shot up in surprised, heart immediately speeding up in stress. 

"What's up, brother?" Campbell spoke, not signing. Okay, so that meant he was in a bad mood. Not good. 

Sam's eyes darted around him, checking to see if there was anybody around in case Campbell got violent when he saw Clark standing by the exit with a baseball bat in his hands. _Fuck_. 

The look on Campbell's face when Sam's eyes returned to him was pure evil, the satisfaction of Sam being aware of what was about to come or happen was evident, his lips forming a dangerous smirk. 

"I heard a little rumor!" Sam's fists clenched at his sides in anticipation. "Apparently, you became a father!" Campbell crouched down to Sam's level, face intimidatingly close. "How does that happen huh? A gay boy becoming a father? Decided to at least try to swing for the right team? I mean, Becca's hot shit, at least you did that right." A frown appeared on Sam's face before he could hold it back, obviously not going unnoticed by Campbell. 

"Oh, you don't agree to that?" The same smirk returned, only even darker this time. "Of course you don't."

Sam hadn't bothered to say anything to Campbell so far, knowing that it would only make him more aggressive and therefore violent. He could feel the time ticking by, and it was either him or Campbell tat was bound to explode. 

"You see, I'd love to meet my little cousin someday, if you're really the father you say you are." A knife snapped open right next to Sam's cheek, coming out of nowhere and obviously startling the boy. An evil chuckle left Campbell's lips. 

"But don't think I'm not aware of what you were doing the other day. Coming over to talk? I know you're up to something, and I _will_ make you regret it." The knife slit his cheek in a millisecond, taking Sam even more by surprise as he fell backwards in hope of shielding himself for perhaps another attempt. With his arms protectively up, he saw Campbell rubbing the blood he drew off on his white shirt, tucking the knife away in his back pocket. 

"That's all. _For today_."

And with that, Campbell exited the library as if nothing had happened. Clark's eyes looked at him with regret, his hands tightening on the baseball bat. "I'm sorry," he mouthed before he disappeared. 

A single tear left Sam's eye as he let himself fall against the bookshelf. He sent Becca a text that said ' _He knows_ ', knowing that she'd understand before he let himself fall into his sadness. 

 

* * * 

 

"Fuck," Becca's voice strained, breaking as she startled mumbling things to herself after having read the text. 

"Becca?" Grizz' voice called out from the living room, where he still had Eden wrapped tightly in his arms, "Everything okay?" She entered the room, hands shaking as she walked over to Frizz and reached for Eden. Grizz' concern shot through the roof at the sight of the girl. "What is it?" What's wrong?" He spoke, handing Eden over to Becca and guiding her to the couch. 

"He knows about Eden." She spoke, shaky hands softly caressing Eden's head. _Fuck_. 

**Author's Note:**

> quick lil preview :)
> 
> pls leave a comment, I rlly need feedback lol


End file.
